“Stop trying to calm the storm, calm yourself,
And the storm will pass.”
This highly appropriate advice has been widely passed on for several thousand years, since it was first given to his followers by Gautama Buddha. He would use it to draw attention of his followers of learning to deal with life’s crises. He was, at the time, reminding them that although they have been given a free will to believe what they chose to believe, yet if they chose fear, rather than love, they will end up spending their lives battling the storms of uncertainty that are all around them. But if they chose love, and trusted themselves to be patient and understanding, the storm will soon end, and the bright sunshine will show them the way home. At any given moment on o journey through life, any one of us could find ourselves in a storm of uncertainty, when we lose control and end up being buffeted by the elements that are intent on bringing us down. Unfortunately, so many of us, overcome by these destructive forces of threats and uncertainty, will choose to succumb with fear, give up in horror, and end up paying the ultimate price. And yet, as Buddha so wisely counselled, all we needed to do was to step back long enough for the storm to pass, a find our way back.
Devote Christians, for as long as Christianity has been in existence, express this in a somewhat different but essentially similar manner. Whenever they are faced with situations of overwhelming uncertainty, when the storm threatens to sink their ship of life, and all seems to be hopeless, they will declare, in hopeful anticipation:
“Let Go, and Let God.”
In those times when the turmoil in our lives becomes unbearable, rather than stubbornly trying to control our lives, we must learn that by surrendering to God’s power, by letting go of our lingering doubts, by letting God to take control, our lives will be whole again.
In recent times, I too, have found myself engulfed in a storm that threatens my life itself. And as the dark clouds engulfed me and threatened to drown me in the stormy seas of uncertainty, the spirit in me, instead of accepting the road of letting go, until the storm has passed, or trusting on the almighty God, to guide me to safer waters, chose to do, as I have done all my life, to take control and try to bend it to my will. Alas, I paid the ultimate price, and suffered the pain that results from the resulting fear and intimidation, and in doing so, I also triggered unnecessary pain and suffering among those I care about. It took my only son, Ted, to do, as he so often has done, to make use of his latent philosophical wisdom, to remind me of my failures. as he explained:
“Dad stop being the tugboat that you have been all your life, trying to control and guide the lives of yourself, and others into the right direction. That boat is no more!
You are now a sailboat, subject to the wind, that arrives at its own time, and takes you in its own direction.
Learn that your only responsibility is the wait patiently for the wind to blow, and then enjoy the trip it chooses to follow.”
As I reflected on his advice, I realized how much I had rejected this simple advice throughout my life. For, like so many others with whom I worked and competed throughout my life, it was never in me to just wait for the storm to pass. Instead, I subscribed to the view, quite often attributed to an Unknown Author that advised:
“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass;
It’s about learning to dance in the rain”
As I saw it, far too many gifted and talented people wasted their special qualities by just waiting for the right moment to come. Rather than learning to make use of the storm in ways to help you, or at least, allowing you to complete your task, we end up, wasting valuable time and opportunities that may be lost forever. My view was that we will all face storms throughout our lives, but they were meant to test us, and never to teach us to how to hide from them. In fact, as the quotation suggests, by learning to dance in the rain, we are in fact meant to make it an enjoyment, even as the rain soaks us.
It was against this background that I had led my life, for as long as I lived. As a child, I was infused with curiosity, willing to try any challenge that came along. I tried my first cigarette at 7 years old, got into a fight with a much older boy at 8 years, and was nearly drowned twice by foolish escapades before I was 10 years old. In school, I accepted any challenge that came my way, and always insisted on being the leader, whenever the opportunity arose. And for all my many years of medical practice, my patients knew me as a decisive person who always took charge and was deeply concerned for their welfare.
My son, had good reason to described as a Tugboat. For in the same way, that a good tugboat ensures that all the ships, large and small, find safety in entering and leaving the harbor, and does so, by exercising control over the direction they must all follow, so too I have devoted my life to trying to keep myself and others in good health and happiness. Now it comes as an unpleasant surprise to me, that I find myself faced with storms that are beyond my control, and rain that I could not dance in, and that, like it or not, my tugboat, for all intents and purpose is now idle and unable to continue to do its job.
It was in this setting that Ted felt compelled to remind me that the old, familiar tugboat is no more, and that I must learn to recognize that I am merely a sailboat whose only source of compulsion is the wind. And that the only movement and direction I can ever expect is when the wind chooses to blow in the direction of its choice. But then he hastened to remind me that if I allowed it to do its work, without objection or rejections, I might be surprised how happy I shall be. -The message I heard was loud and clear; that I must always be willing to accept the many storms in our life when they appear, and instead of trying to fight against, I must learn to step around and find new interests. As the following quotation, originally coined by the famous American Christian anarchist, Elbert Hubbard, and made popular by the very successful American author and inspirational speaker, Dale Carnegie so very wisely advised:
“If life serves you lens, then learn to make lemonade.”
-This indeed, is the true message that his Holiness Gautama Buddha, and the countless numbers of Religious and Learned Leaders have tried to pass on to the people over the several millennia of man’s existence on this earth. For every storm, like every lemon that man receives, can become a source of happiness, if he takes the time to make the best of the conditions that surround him.
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