"When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced.
Live your life so that when you die, the world cries, and
you rejoice."
This profound statement, ascribed to the great Chief White Elk in the folklore of the Cherokee Indian Nation of North America, will go down as one of the most important observations ever recorded. In just a few, well chosen words, it casts a bright light on how we should all spend the brief period of life allotted to each one of us on earth, and the quality of image we should leave behind.
At birth we, as newborn infants, all cried as we resented the change of milieu we were forced to endure, but yet there was joy all around at our arrival. And at our death, we have no way of gauging the impact of our life except on how the people around us responded. If there is joy and celebration expressed by all, we will know our living would have been a failure, and our departing was a relief. But if there was regret and disappointment for our departure among those left behind, then clearly our life was well spent, and our life on this earth will be remembered for our presence and our caring.
When we all make our entry into this world, we are like empty vessels, brimming with hope and expectation. But unfortunately, most of us will end up having wasted our lives by blindly following ‘the crowd’ and trying to conform to their demands. To be like them, we chose to live our whole lives in search of popularity, and eager to find acceptance, and we pay little heed to being who we really are, and living the life we ought to be living. We spend our lives doing things to please our selfish desires, or to satisfy the demands of other, and we devote our efforts entirely to achieving fame and fortune, and to the accumulation of material possessions. And we often do so knowingly at the expense of others, and without any regard or awareness of the consequences of our actions, and the impact created by them. Perhaps John Heywood, the well-respected English 15th century poet and playwright was correct when he noted:
“There are none so blind as those who will not see. The most deluded people are those who choose to ignore what they already know.”
We give little regard to how our behavior affects the lives of our neighbors, and we care less about their needs and aspirations. We are driven headlong with the desire to be successful at all cost, and do everything to receive the acclamation of our neighbors; without giving any consideration to the damage we do to others, either by design or by neglect. We “strut and fret” about, demanding attention and become disappointed or angry when the attention is not forthcoming. And on those occasions when we fail to receive satisfaction, we are ready to blame everyone for our failures, and take every opportunity to accuse others for their shortcomings. These are the trappings that our society requires of us, to be included among the favored, and these are the measures used to decide success or failure.
We live in a society that insists on being the best, irrespective of the circumstances, and one that demands personal satisfaction in order to earn its rewards, its accolades, its embellishments and its monuments. It matters little how, and under what circumstances these are acquired, and even less, what kind of effect the actions had on others. But in truth, all these gains will never be truly fulfilling, they are merely facades that will remain only as long as the individual remains popular. They are all eventually destined to disappear into oblivion, buried with their owners, by the sands of time. As also, will their names and their achievements be equally forgotten by all but a few; and no one will care.
This was certainly not the way we were meant to live in this world of ours, for whatever period allotted to us. Instead, we were expected to adopt a lifestyle of sharing and caring in keeping with the advice of this Unknown Author, who firmly declared:
“Caring for others gives life its most significant meaning.”
We were meant to spend our time on earth caring about the welfare of ourselves and others, and doing what we can to improve the lives and the opportunities of those who, because of circumstances, illness, need, ignorance or neglect, are looked down upon and generally consigned to the societies’ rubbish heaps. The people who succeed in doing so are never forgotten, on the contrary, their names and deeds are recorded, repeated and remembered long after they have departed, not for the monument they left behind, but by the changes they brought with them; and the good feelings they left behind. As Margaret Mead, the renowned American cultural anthropologist, so saliently reminded us all when she observed:
“Never believe that a few Caring people can't change the world. Indeed, that's all who ever have”.
Throughout history, every generation has produced its own select compliment of candidates, all of whom possessed that common factor of caring for others, and devoting their lives to doing what is necessary to improve their lives and opportunities. Their names and their works are indelibly recorded in the history of mankind, and the world indeed has recognized these people and continues to do so with the passage of time. The names of such people like St. Francis of Assisi, Saint Teresa of Kolkata, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Nelson Mandela, Louis Pasteur and Albert Schweitzer, will live into posterity not for the empires they built, or the material wealth they acquired, but for the lives they led, the people they helped, and the examples they set.
In these current days of excesses and over indulgences, it is very tempting to follow the crowd and fall into a life of selfishness and self-gratification and spend your life, as so many are doing, only focusing on goals and desires and then justify this by adopting the popular attitude of ‘taking care of number one.” From early life we are being taught to “mind our own business” and we grow up believing that the less we become involved with other people, the better we can take care of ourselves. Our societies are being driven by a form of social paranoia, as we shy away further and further from the fundamental principles of care, love, affection and compassion that our forefathers preferred. Where our society adoringly creates a golden effigy of a failed leader, a man who is more concerned with himself, and totally unconcerned about his effect on others.
Mankind was never meant to live such a life of selfish indifference. Professor Alan Dershowitz, the outstanding American lawyer, author and one of the leading defenders of civil liberties, recognized this human trait when he described:
“Good character consists of recognizing the selfishness that is inherent in each of us, and trying to balance it against the altruism to which we should all aspire.”
Without any doubt, life will become far more rewarding if one spends enough time caring about the welfare of the other people around, as one spends taking care of oneself. This, after all is said and done, is undoubtedly the highest of human qualities.
Just by providing a listening ear, or extending a helping hand, or becoming concerned in, and providing support to people in need, will go a long way in making you a better person. To be more caring, you must be less self-absorbed, and instead become more appreciative of the people in your life. We need to learn to be more grateful to others, and more concerned about their welfare, and of this earth that we all share. For by doing this, our humanity will surely grow and we will begin to realize the truth that mankind was never intended to be like isolated islands in a sea of humanity, but rather, as so many individual branches of the same tree, closely interconnected, yet independent; with each one of them supporting the other.
Professor Leo Buscaglia, the very successful public speaker and one of America’s most popular authors and inspirational gurus, who devoted his teachings to love and caring, spent his life trying to makes us aware of the need for caring and the dangers of trying to live a life of selfish isolation. He explained his beliefs in the following terms:
“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring; All of which have the potential to turn a life around.”
-The truth in these words rings out loudly and clearly to anyone who will listen. But unfortunately, so many people have been so deafened by the cacophony of modern civilization, that they never hear a single word of good reason. As a result, these people are doomed to a life devoid of the joy and satisfaction from caring, and forced to live in a world of suspicion and distrust. We have yet to realize that this is the price that is being paid by all who choose to live a life devoid of caring.
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