DARE TO LIVE LIFE

DARE TO LIVE LIFE

“Dare to live the life you have dreamed for yourself. Go forward and make your dreams come true.”

This unforgettably powerful advice was given by the great American essayist and lecturer Ralph Waldo Emerson in 1858 when he addressed the graduating class at Harvard University, urging them to go forward and live their dreams. It has remained a standard call that has been repeated over and over to any one who dared to live their life on their own terms.

Gen. Alexander M Haig Jnr., the American military leader and elder statesman, expressed this idea in a somewhat more decisive manner when he stated:

  “Ultimately the fundamental difference between us when we are faced with adversity lies in our willingness to dare or not to dare and for no other reason”

                                                                  

This advice in fact applies to each and every one of us and to everything that we do or do not do in our lives. It calls on each one of us to recognize it’s validity in our own way, and to what extent we are prepared to respond and to how much we are prepared to expend.

                                                                        

Almost 2000 years ago, Lucius Annaeus Seneca, the great Roman philosopher and statesman, recognized this paradox and the reason why we choose different outcomes when he wrote:

“It is not because things are difficult, that we do not Dare,
it is because we do not Dare, that they are difficult.”

That statement is as valid and as relevant now as it was 2000 years ago. Every one of us can readily think of other people whose behavior or attitude toward a special occasion or event has so impressed us that we stand in awe of them. These people were not superhuman, nor were they endowed with any special gifts. They came from among us and shared our weaknesses and our strengths. The only difference is that in that very special situation and under very special conditions, they faced and dealt with adversity at a level far above their comfort levels. They dared to rise above their obstacles and live life above and beyond their normal expectations.
        

Of the very many examples that have crossed my life over the years, three have impressed me and have left indelible imprints on me, each for a different reason;

     The first is the renowned theoretical physicist Stephen William Hawking, whose contributions to the fields of quantum gravity and cosmology are hailed by the world's community of scientists. In his lifetime, he has opened up our understanding of the origin of the universe and facilitated space study, understanding and exploration.
     At the age of 21 years, while still a student at Cambridge University, England, he was diagnosed with a serious neuromuscular disease, Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS). This is a uniformly fatal disease, characterized by progressive paralysis of all the body’s muscles leading to total incapacity. Yet despite progressive, relentless and incapacitating deterioration, he continued to lead an active academic life, lecturing all over the world, publishing many original and ground-breaking papers and scholarly books. Amazingly, he was able to lead a full and rewarding personal life. He is married with three children, has traveled to many countries and participated in a range of lifestyle experiences, including traveling into outer space.
   All of this was accomplished while being almost completely paralyzed and confined permanently to a wheelchair. He is able to communicate only by using a single facial muscle and a very sophisticated computer system. Despite this, he continues to combine family life with his teaching and research into theoretical physics with an extensive program of travel and public lectures.

   To meet this man is awe-inspiring, not only for the brilliance of his mind, but even much more, to witness the way he was able to overcome these gargantuan obstacles with an aura of confidence and optimism, even as he appears as a “crumpled bundle of humanity” with only a flutter of his muscle to communicate to the world. Indeed his is the story of a man who defiantly faced his obstacles, and dared to live his life to its fullest.
            

The second is someone with whom I have had a close relationship for most of my life. He is a man who, for as long as I have known him, has been an indefatigably ambitious man who has never flinched from a challenge and very rarely lost anyone of them. By dint of intense personal effort, hard work and an inexhaustible supply of optimism, he has developed a very successful enterprise and an equally enviable reputation. He has earned the highest respect from his community for his Business skills and generous philanthropy.
     Recently, as a result of a series of unfortunate accidents and some questionable medical management, he suffered a serious neck injury leading to almost complete paralysis of the upper and lower body resulting in total dependence on others and confinement to bed.

    To any other man, including myself, this would have resulted in such disappointment and antagonism as to precipitate profound anger and resentment. But in this case this did not happen. Instead we witnessed a change that was at once philosophical as it was a genuine acceptance of a “new life”. Rather than resentment, there was a genuine desire to adapt and to accommodate, and instead of anger, there was an urgent effort to learn so that he could teach others by example and experience. Here again, is a unique example of a man who refused to succumb to life-changing adversity and instead, he grabbed it with both hands and dared to live his new life to his fulfillment.

                      

     The third person’s story came to my attention following the publication of his autobiography entitled “Ghost Boy” a few years ago. It recalls the account of a young man who suffered a life shattering disease at the age of twelve years causing him to gradually lose control of his body and finally falling into a coma at age sixteen. He subsequently began to show gradual recovery of consciousness but not function, so that by age nineteen he was fully conscious, apparently totally aware of his surroundings but unable to communicate. At least this was the assumption for a long time until an alert caregiver recognized that he used his eyes to respond to her and to indicate that he understood. It was only then that corrective action was started. He was provided with a specially adapted speech computer which allowed him to communicate with others. Over the succeeding years he was able to gain further improvement in function so much so that he was able to complete his education, get married and start work. Despite this traumatic experience, this young man has shown great courage and sensitivity without any regret, and has dared to live his new life unfazed by past experiences. Catherine Deveney, an author and journalist, described this in greater detail in an article in The Scotsman Newspaper in 2011:

“His levels of empathy are remarkable, perhaps because he was forced for so many years into the role of watcher and listener, hearing people unburden their problems around him absorbing their pain without them knowing. His communication is strikingly direct, almost fearless in the way he confronts emotional reality."
        

These are but three examples of thousands that exist around us. They are individually inspiring to us as witnesses of the events and induce in us a sense of awe and disbelief, but to the individuals, they are merely natural responses to the circumstances of life.

           

         This indeed is the true test of our characters and the fundamental differences among us. It is when we are faced with adversity and we are called upon to deal with it, that our true character comes out. No one ever said life was easy or fair and none ever promised a bed of roses free from thorns, but we all have within us the ability to overcome these obstacles. The only question is whether we choose to make the effort, to dare, to face them!

           

         In this context we should recognize that this ability is by no means unique to just the few successful people but available to all. Throughout the ages, the single most consistent attribute among all who have set out to achieve and succeeded to do so, is the willingness to face difficulties and dare to overcome them at all cost. We see this every day, in every situation and it involves everybody. The only consistent ingredient necessary in every instant is the recognition that, with the right spirit and a willingness to overcome failure, any thing can be achieved. The late Robert F. Kennedy, American Senator and Attorney-General, summarized this most eloquently when he wrote:

“Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly.”

                                        

-No greater advice than this can ever be given!

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