DAILY SLICE OF LIFE - On Becoming a Champion

“Champions are made from something that they have inside of them; a desire, a dream, a vision.”

         This profound observation made by Mahatma Gandhi, the great Indian leader who led his country to independence in 1947 using only non-violent resistance, speaks volumes to the fundamental fact that the making of a champion demands much more than innate ability to compete and to triumph in competition. Gandhi, who arose from humble beginnings to become one of the greatest revolutionary leaders in modern history, stands out as one of the world’s finest statesmen and a champion in every sense of the word.

         True champions are people who are willing to go beyond their own limits to complete the task they set for themselves. Their strength of character and drive to succeed is fueled by their insatiable desire to achieve the target they had chosen to do so. Whether in the field of competitive sports, or in any other area of human endeavor, true champions tend to share a number of common characteristics that are dedicated to the enhancement of their chances to compete and to win. They all share a vision for their desired goal and a belief that they will achieve it, however difficult that may be. They all possess the insatiable drive needed to undertake the task to completion, and the courage to accept the failed attempts as lessons to improve. Interestingly, they all seem to possess the admirable attitude of treating their competitors with the respect they deserve, and taking every opportunity to learn from them.

One of the constant hallmarks of every champion is their single-minded confidence in their ability to deal with any challenge they undertake. They are relentless and determined in their aims to succeed, and are not affected by the criticisms or obstacles they encounter. Above all, they recognize that any venture will invariably involve a roller coaster of emotional ups and downs and that they must be able and willing to accept the consequences as they focus on the ultimate ride to success. They are, for the most part, pragmatic people who have no difficulty in accepting their strengths as well as their weaknesses. They never look for excuses to explain failure, but instead look for reasons. Sugar Ray Robinson (Walker Smith Jr.), an American professional boxer who held both the welterweight and middleweight world boxing crowns for several years, and is considered by many experts as the greatest boxer of all times, in a simple but powerful statement, explained this attitude in these terms:

 “To be a champion, you have to believe in yourself, when no one else will.”

Unfortunately, the price that is extracted from anyone who chooses to travel that lonely road is quite often formidable, and is usually the reason why so many good people will not even consider taking the chance. Even before declaring their intentions, they must first confront and deal with their own fears and their insecurities, and be sure of their desire to succeed. And as they embark on the project they must find the strength and determination to continue forward relentlessly, to step out of their comfort zones, to push beyond there own limits and capabilities, and to do so over and over until the final goal has been achieved. For the majority of people, however well-intention and optimistic they may be, they invariably falter and stumble long before their plans go into effect.

Contrary to popular belief, becoming a champion is never an inherited trait, and it can only take place in someone who not only possesses the ability to go with his vision or dream or goal, but have the courage to rise above the ordinary and to search for, and find the extraordinary. But for any champion to be worthy of respect, he must not only be strong and competent in his ability to succeed, but, much more important, he must also be a man of strong human qualities and standards. This is the fundamental difference between the ‘winner’ and the ‘champion,’ and then, and only then, can he claim to be the true champion. Benjamin Franklin, one of America’s founding fathers, a statesman and an inventor of note, placed this in perfect context when he declared:

“It is a grand mistake to think of been great without goodness, and I pronounce it as certain, there was never a great man that was not at the same time truly virtuous.”

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DAILY SLICE OF LIFE - Choices in Life

       “The saddest summary of life contains three descriptions,

       ‘Could have’, ‘Might have’, or ‘Should have.”

This statement by an Unknown Author is a powerful commentary on the quality of life we are likely to live when we make the wrong choices or chose not to make the right ones. It has become over the years, a standard by which the life we lead is measured.

From our very beginning of life and continuing to the very end, we are constantly presented with situations from which we must choose. Some of these choices are made after careful thought and consideration, while many of them result from automatic or impulsive responses, but they all are capable of having a lasting impact on our lives and the lives of others who depend on us. Every single day of our lives we have to face choices. We have to decide each morning whether we get up and face the day, or to roll over and continue to sleep. We have to make a choice what our day will be like, and what we should be doing. In fact, it would be correct to suggest that every-thing a person consciously does for all of the day is subject to some kind of choice.

Specific choices are operating when we appreciate what we do or resent it, become excited and happy or dejected and sad, pursue our goals or do nothing, associate with people who are helpful or withdraw and withhold our attention. In fact, all the countless living activities that together make up a day, can only have occurred as a result of choices made by or for the person. Choices have been likened to the ‘tools’ contained in a person’s box of living. Without them, life cannot progress and instead, our lives will be subjected to the winds and the storms of the environment around us. But with them, they are useful guides that serve to assist the person to live a lifetime of satisfaction and fulfillment.

 By far the most important life choice  that each one of us must make is how we choose to live our life. This directly implies choosing the basic core of beliefs that will shape our character and define our purpose. These set the standards and the values that determine how we live, what we believe, where we are heading and what we are looking for. They influence not only how we conduct our day to day living, but our hopes and dreams for the future and to some extent, even beyond. When these choices are wrong, when they are dictated by self-interest, greed, selfishness, or a lust for power, we quickly lose respect for life and replace it with self-gratification and domination.

         Unfortunately, too many people ignore the choices that lead to personal growth and to satisfaction, and instead spend their lives in the wasteful pursuit of other people’s achievements and end up living in constant frustration, regret, and dissatisfaction. Rather than choosing the path best suited for them, they succumb to the demands of their society to follow their lead and end up losing sight of their own choices. To be truly effective choices must always reflect the needs of the individual and never tailored to suit the needs of others.  There is no difference in the joy and fulfillment experienced for a task that is satisfactorily completed, whether it is by an architect completing a towering structure, or a surgeon completing a life-saving procedure, or the teacher at the end of a grueling day, or the shoemaker upon completing a pair of shoes. Although they are all totally unrelated activities, they are all choices consciously made individually to provide equal gratification and self-respect.

It is this exercise of our fundamental choices that makes the difference in our lives. This is because when these choices are freely executed we are provided with the confidence to make mistakes but not give up, to succeed and move on, and to seek opportunities and find them. Unfortunately, this does not happen as often as it should, not because the basic opportunities for the exercise of choice are not available, but because of our innate tendency to hold on to things and never let go, for fear of losing or being left behind. We end up holding on to failed ideas, even after we realize that letting them go is never the end, but the beginning of new life.

 Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, the renowned Swiss psychiatrist placed this relationship in the right context when she asserted:

“I believe that we are solely responsible for our choices, and we have to accept the consequences of every deed, word, and thought throughout our lifetime.”

-Indeed we are all the products of the choices we make in life, for good or bad. As the sages of the Eastern culture will unhesitatingly attest, this is our Karma!

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DAILY SLICES OF LIFE - Believing in Yourself

“A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the shaking branches, because its trust is not on the branch, but on its wings.”

         This very popular and often repeated statement whose author is unknown, speaks clearly and precisely to the power of believing in oneself. The greatest failing that the human being can ever experience is the tendency to get locked into a negative mode, and spend his life thinking only of his losses and failings, rather than counting the successes and all the good things that happened along the way. In complete contrast, the bird, free from the shackles of the fears and inadequacies that bind the human mind, and having implicit faith in its wings to lift it aloft on demand, remains undisturbed whatever the circumstances.

         The truth is that in this world that we all share, obsessed as it is with the need for conformity, we have been conditioned throughout our lives to doubt our own instincts and instead, trust others. We are constantly encouraged to be careful before we attempt anything, to be guided by what others are thinking, to follow the rules, and to avoid taking chances and risk failure. We are influenced by our own fears and doubts into believing that we are not capable of being the persons we want to be, or to achieve the things we dream of achieving. As a result, guided by what others indicate, we are persuaded to accept less than we hoped for, and that we are not able of fulfilling our own expectations, without other people’s guidance. By any measure, this self-inflicted disease of low self-esteem and reduced trust in oneself, is the single, most disastrous disorder of that can afflict any man.

         When we look in the mirror, the image we actually see of ourselves is never a true reflection of us, but one that is largely modified by what we have learned from our exposure to our environment. It is instead a reflection of the influence of our parents, teachers, contacts and the prevailing attitudes of the society, all of which served to mold our character and affect our self-image. Our true self-image in contrast, has it foundation on our own innate personality make-up, our unique interpretation of events around us, and our own representation of ourselves and our interactions with others. It is this dichotomy between what is expected of the individual by others, and what he expects of himself that has created so much doubt, insecurity and fear of anticipation, and has served to effectively suppress the inborn instinct of belief in one’s ability. Bruce Lee, the highly accomplished Chinese-American actor, a martial arts expert and an acknowledged philosopher in his own right, explained this most effectively when he advised:

“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful person and duplicate it.”

         Even a cursory review of the records of any of the extremely successful people who have shaped history, and left, for good or for evil, indelible marks on the world, will reveal without exception, that the fundamental engine of their success was their unshakeable belief in themselves. In whatever they undertook, their success benefitted greatly from the self-confidence they brought to bear, their willingness to get up over and over again when they failed or when they encountered setbacks, and their unwavering courage to ensure the fulfillment of their hopes and dreams. Their belief in themselves was the single most important force that created in them a vision that withstood the numerous obstacles along the way, and carried them to success. Sylvester Stallone, the very successful film actor, whose life overflows with stories of overcoming impossible obstacles, described the setting in sharp and personal terms:

“No one will hit you harder than life itself. It does not matter how hard you hit back, it’s about you what can take and keep fighting; how much you can suffer and keep moving forward. That’s how you win!”

         History has repeatedly shown that the human mind, if left on its own, is a powerful instrument capable of producing and delivering great things through the power of positive expectation. Unfortunately, this instinct has been greatly compromised by the continuous influence of the external milieu. The fact is that everything that man has ever achieved has resulted from a deep belief in himself, and the belief that the task, however challenging, can be achieved. We should never ever lose sight of this, for when we do, we are condemned to mediocrity. As Napoleon Bonaparte, the outstanding French statesman and military leader who conquered most of Europe, so wisely noted:

“Until you spread your wings, you’ll have no idea how far you can fly.”

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DAILY SLICE OF LIFE -. Belief in Eternity

“He who lives in the present lives in eternity.”

         This complex and confusing observation by Ludwig Wittgenstein, the highly acclaimed Austrian-born, British philosopher, considered by many to be the greatest philosopher of the 20^th century, epitomizes the poor understanding of eternity in the minds of most people. To truly comprehend or acquire a visual imagery or to understand the concept of Eternity is an almost impossible task. The human mind, conditioned as it is to function in concrete terms, is only able to comprehend any object or thought when there are boundaries defining them.  It is impractical to wrap one’s mind around a concept that has no definable past, and no predictable future associated with the tangible present.

In much the same way it is inconceivable for anyone to think of a line without at the same time thinking of a point of beginning and another in the end. Equally, it is impossible to deny the fact that for every action to be completed, it must invariably be initiated by a start. No different is the fact that every thought will never take place without an electrical impulse being generated by a prior chemical interaction. In fact, while all of life can be reduced to single units of cause and effect, and used to compare with other events, or applied for reviewing the past and predicting the future, none of these will explain eternity!

 There is no measure, or standard, or any other possible way known to man that can correctly explain eternity as something that has always existed, with no beginning and no end; or more correctly, that was already present before the beginning and will be present after the end. The human mind is incapable of conceiving anything without an end, and for the same reason, thoughts that are not finite and do not include a beginning and an end are rejected as fantasy. In truth, the only way anyone can even consider the validity of eternity as an entity is to move well beyond the limit of the human mind, and enter into the realm of Blind Belief.

         The Atheist, and to some extent, the Agnostics, in keeping with their belief that there is no God, or any other Supreme Being in any form or nature,  believe that life itself has no reason or meaning other than those dictated by the laws of nature. They are content to scoff at the idea of eternity as merely wishful thinking, and insist that human life, no different than every other object in nature, is subject to the same laws and cycles of life and decay. To them, everything is subject to a life cycle of birth, death and disintegration, and that all the living things will appear, stay for a time and then pass away to be followed by new living things which emerge to take their place. They insist that beyond this natural occurrence, no explanation is necessary or even acceptable.

         It is clear that, by its very nature, proof of Eternity can never be demonstrated in the way that other tangible objects can. But for as long as there is recorded history, there have been on-going debates on the subject by philosophers and thinkers all over the civilized world. From the ancient Chinese to the Greek and Roman philosophers, and all the major religions, including the Hindu, Buddhist, Moslem, Jewish and Christian, there have been constant arguments in favor of its reality as a manifestation of a Supreme Being who created the universe and all in it. But they all acknowledge that by its very nature, it is impossible to demonstrate its existence and, that at the same time it requires a belief in a Supreme Being to whom all things are possible. Eternity will never be a consideration without a Supreme Being who is himself, Eternal.

         In the final analysis, eternity like so many other mysteries that are encountered in living, will remain beyond the realm of human ability and can only be acceptable on faith. For myself, I have no difficulty in accepting the concept of an Eternal God who has existed before the beginning of time, and will continue at the end of time. I have expressed this belief to all who will care to listen in these terms:

“I believe life is an exquisite and precious expression of a greater plan by a Supreme Being, in which our time spent on earth is but a short segment of a journey, which began in eternity and will continue into eternity.”

-In the end, it is, as it has always been, that Eternity is a personal conviction, subject to an understanding between himself and his God!

 

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DAILY SLICE OF LIFE - Finding your Personality

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”

         This statement first recorded by Aristotle, one of the greatest of the ancient Greek philosophers, in the 4^th century BC, has stood the test of time, and is as relevant today as it was thousands of years ago.

You can only begin to know yourself after you have begun to understand your own personality. Without this knowledge, you can never ever succeed to fully be the person you should be.

        

Personality is often characterized as the internal philosophy of the person. It essentially determines who he is, and how he sees the world around him. it is made up from components of all the thoughts, beliefs, ideas and passions that he experienced along his road of life, and is reflected in everything he chooses to think and do throughout his life. Although there have been a multitude of descriptions offered, they all refer to a pattern of relatively permanent characteristics and traits which provides and ensures the uniqueness, predictability, and consistency in the person’s behavior.

The ancient Greek and Roman philosophers were convinced that all the personality types can be included under one of four distinct and easily recognizable categories which were directly traceable to the four main bodily functions they called Humors. Led by the great Greek philosopher, Hippocrates, they believed each type of personality was developed from the humor that was dominant at birth, and that the individual’s subsequent appearance and behavior reflected this pattern throughout his life. He categorized them into:

Yellow Bile, (Choleric) the dominant, confident, energetic and

                  passionate individual, quite often extroverted.

Black Bile, (Melancholic), the thoughtful, brooding and sensitive

                introvert who is usually idealistic and a perfectionist and

                often angry and suspicious.

  Phlegm, (Phlegmatic), the relaxed, calm and controlled, consistent,

               stable and loyal person who was trusted, friendly, and

                 usually peace-loving.

    Blood, (Sanguine), the generally lively, optimistic, creative, and

                 carefree person, often adventurous and willing to take

                 chances.

Although this classification is no longer acceptable with current psychologists, the basic grouping and the descriptions for each remain unchanged and readily identifiable.

         A variety of tests and questionnaires have been devised to identify and predict the individual’s make-up and behavior, but all of these are only as useful as the individual’s own assessment. He must begin by recognizing his personal values, the ideas that shape all his decisions. These form the framework of his thinking and his actions and without them he is at the mercy of circumstances. He must also be conversant with his inner passions, which provided the focus for all his actions. In addition he must also be willing to honestly review and acknowledge his strengths and weaknesses and concentrate on the former to ensure success. Equally, he must be aware of the response of others and be willing to compare them with your own, if only to assess whether he is truly achieving his desired goals. These are the hallmarks by which a person is able find his true self, and to be the best he can possibly be.

The ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tsu very correctly explained the fundamental purpose of understanding oneself when he wrote:

“Knowing is intelligence; knowing yourself is true wisdom.

Mastering others is strength; mastering yourself is true power.”

-Without question, no one can ever hope to achieve any level of recognition or success without first fully understanding and mastering his own personality.

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DAILY SLICES OF LIFE - Living in Loneliness

“Life is an island in an ocean of loneliness.”

This very insightful observation was recorded by the very well respected and gifted Lebanese-American philosopher, poet, author and artist, Khalil Gibran, in his brilliantly written book on life which he titled: ‘A Second Treasury.” He viewed each person as being an individual island floating in the sea of life, with each one trying to navigate his way through an ocean of lonely experiences, and most of the time having difficulty in finding a way out.

         Loneliness is a universal human experience. No one can ever claim to be immune from experiencing episodes of loneliness, and few, if any, of us will have any difficulty in readily identifying some of the instances that have left indelible scars on our psyche. It exists all around us; we feel it within ourselves as a sense of isolation with an underlying aura of hopelessness and helplessness that often induces fear and inadequacy; at times causing a mixture of emotional and physiological disturbances. We see it in our friends and in our family, among our neighbors and in strangers, and we read about it in our books and newspapers. When left unresolved, loneliness can induce social isolation, cause disturbances in thoughts and actions, and result in serious interference in the quality of life.

         It has no single cause, and it does not respect any particular age, sex, intellectual ability or socioeconomic status. Its origins are often complex in nature and not readily identifiable, but it has a strong correlation to a person‘s underlying personality and psychological characteristics, as well as his developmental influences. Its symptom presentation is quite unique to each individual and requires equally individual attention to be corrected. The recent increasing incidences of social isolation so common among the older generations, have produced catastrophic consequences, which continue to explode as the population continues to grow older and more fragile, and longstanding relationships disintegrate. 

         Recognizing loneliness and its many sequelae is not usually a difficult undertaking, but to successfully correct it in ourselves or in others, can often be a formidable task. It requires not only securing the necessary insight needed for oneself, but also an understanding of the stresses caused by the external milieu and finding appropriate ways to neutralize them. This has led Dr. Albert Schweitzer, the renowned French-German theologian, author, philosopher and physician, a recognized polymath and a Nobel Laureate, and founder of a hospital in Africa, to very wisely conclude:

“We are all so much together,

but we are all dying of loneliness”

-By any measure one may choose, loneliness is the single, most destructive force to humanity!

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DAILY SLICES OF LIFE - Honor among Men

“Life, every man holds dear; but the dear man holds honor far more precious than life.”

The above statement written by the great English poet and playwright, William Shakespeare in one of his lesser known tragedies, Troilus and Cressida, defines the true meaning of Honor among men. For any man worthy of the name, life is never worth any price that will compromise his principles and question his honor, irrespective of the circumstances.

 

Honor is defined in many ways, but essentially relates to the respect and esteem earned by an individual strictly through deed and reputation. It does not relate to the automatic recognition of position or status of any one, nor is it ever earned by simply doing remarkable things, even in impossible situations. Instead, it is earned by the step-by-step acquisition of respect from others for deeds done, and actions undertaken. The process is essentially slow and deliberate; as good deeds accumulate, respect gradually builds; and in time, with more deeds and more respect, comes Honor!

           

Honor is neither inherited nor does it necessarily pass from generation to generation; and it most certainly cannot be learnt from reading books or listening to others. It can only be acquired by consciously setting a high regard for personal principles, integrity and honesty, and by respecting the rights of others to do the same. It can be passed on only by example, by setting and maintaining standards, and by the provision of the right milieu of trust and respect in which to develop. A child growing up in a home where respect, loyalty and commitment are the norms will have a better chance of developing these principles than one who does not. In my own life, whatever sense of honor that I may possess is a direct reflection of the thinking and the actions of my own parents, and their constantly repeated principle, drilled into us:

“Your word is your bond.”

In the very same way, a society which recognizes the importance of Honor is more likely to produce people of similar behavior among its members. And in absence of this, the results are equally predictable as Herbert Hoover, the 31^st President of the United States of America so clearly explained:

“Where there is lack of honor in Government,

the moral of the whole people are poisoned.”

Unfortunately the world we all share is suffering from major discontent mainly because the people and their leaders have chosen to only give lip-service to honor, while they proceed to do whatever they can to control and to dominate. It should be no surprise therefore to find that instead of a world characterized by respect and honor among the people, we are faced with the opposite, where the leaders themselves are without honor and intent on retaining and expanding power by any means they can devise; and the people, poisoned by them, have become subservient to their will.

         In the final analysis, perhaps the highly respected German-Swiss author, poet, painter and Nobel laureate Hermann Hesse accurately understood, as we all should do as well, the true meaning of honor among men when he wrote:

“It is not our purpose to become each other; it is to recognize each other, to learn to see the other, and to honor him for what he is.”

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