REMEMBERING THE PAST

“Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

         This very famous and often repeated quotation is generally attributed to George Santayana, the Spanish-born, American-educated author, philosopher and essayist whose work is highly acclaimed throughout the Western world. Since his original quotation, several variations have appeared by different authors, all of which leading to the same conclusion. They all echo the somewhat more cynical original version, written more than 50 years earlier by the great Irish social critic, playwright and philosopher George Bernard Shaw which stated:

“The only thing man learns from history is that man learns nothing from history.”

  Regardless of the language used, the sentiment is clear and unambiguous; that all the great lessons that ought to be learnt from past experiences are not being learnt, and as a result we continue to make the same bad choices and repeat the past mistakes.

          It is very difficult to disagree with, or challenge these sentiments. For as long as history records have been available, there is overwhelming confirmation that man has not learnt any lessons from the mistakes of the past, and unfortunately, continues to repeat them over and over. Even more disappointingly, this situation occurs equally among those who are fully informed, as it is with those who are not aware of them. It seems that knowing about the events and the results of the past, appears to have no impact in the present activity.

         Clearly people who do not learn from their mistakes do not mature, and as a result the incidence of anti-social behavior, drug abuse, disruptive family dynamics and crime continues to rise in parallel. Instead of learning from the past and trying to find causes and correcting them, there is the tendency to shift blame on other factors, to create unrest and conflict within communities and between races and religions. All of which can be directly attributed to a lack of understanding of the lessons of the past, or the unwillingness to actually learn them.     

         History is a record of people’s behavior. In its pages can be found how people lived, thought and interacted to the prevailing circumstances. In it, can be traced the story of human development and behavior going back for many centuries. In fact, it is the most reliable tool available to man for understanding how the world evolved and why events took place. It tells us about the changing circumstances and how we reacted to them. The story is ongoing and contains a mixture of good and evil, of heroes and villains, of successes and failures, and everything in between. All of which is available to us, to learn from its mistakes, and to improve on its successes, and as a result benefit from the information and build on its achievements. But unfortunately this never happens!

         The world is presently undergoing catastrophic turmoil affecting all the nations in one way or another. But the underlying causes are not fundamentally different than they have been throughout the ages and unfortunately like our ancestors, we have yet to spend the time to learn the lessons from the past experiences that are clearly recorded in the pages of history. Throughout the millennia of man’s existence on earth, it has been plagued by the same recurring problems of war, disease and hunger. Man has yet to learn this glaring lesson from history; it is a fundamental flaw in human nature that stands in the way of peace, absence of want and freedom from disease. It is human nature, guided by a desire for greed, domination and control that is the root cause of humanity’s problems. It comes under an endless combination of excuses that include race, appearance, religion and ethnicity, among so many others, but all can be traced back to human ignorance of history and an unwillingness to learn from it.

         Therein lays the root causes of all the conflicts, deprivation and suffering that have washed over the world like so many disease epidemics. Despite being counseled by history itself, man has chosen to disregard the lessons that must be learnt in order to correct the negative forces that drive humanity to hold on to everything rather than sharing without anger and resentment. Abraham Lincoln, while speaking after the end of the disastrous American Civil War in 1865, described in brilliantly prophetic words, the action that must be taken following the concluded war:

“Human nature will not change. In any future great national trial, compared with the men of this, we shall have as weak and as strong, as silly and as wise, as bad and as good. Let us therefore study the incidents in this as philosophy to learn wisdom from them, and none of them as wrongs to be avenged.”

Until we have learnt the wisdom of these words and put into place the actions necessary, we, like our predecessors before us, and those who will follow us, are doomed to live out our lives in a world of unrelenting strife and conflict.

-This is the price we pay for not learning the lessons from the pages of history.

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MAKING A DIFFERENCE

      “It is not what you possess in life that makes you so important.

      It is who you are, that makes the difference.”

                                                        

The above comment was made to me by my niece Sylvia, many years ago in the context of her late father’s impact on her life. He had only recently passed away following a long period of severe physical incapacity resulting from an unfortunate accident he had sustained. She insisted that the most memorable part of him was neither the businesses he developed, nor the buildings he built, nor even the reputation he acquired from his peers, however formidable that they each were. To her, the true measure of the man was in the person he was. In his total devotion and commitment to his wife and his family, the care and concern for the welfare of those who worked for him, the respect he showed to everyone, irrespective of social or economic status and above all else, in his genuine humanity. She insisted that while the businesses he built and the buildings he erected may change with time, the man he was and the reputation he has left behind will live on in the lives and minds of all those who knew and loved him.  To her, this is the most important value a man can possess; anything else about him will be secondary and less consequential.

There are many who will not agree with this statement, but to me the pursuit of one’s humanity is paramount, and rises above all else. The act of setting aside one’s own ego with its selfish demands, and instead, seeking the welfare of another individual or situation, whether solicited or unsolicited, is far more rewarding and satisfying. By doing so, by giving rather than demanding, we not only express our fundamental human spirit, but also acknowledge that there is indeed much more in life than merely the pursuit of any greedy personal conveniences and the gratification of our selfish desires. 

         Victor Frankl, a fine example of a true humanitarian, whose life-story before, during and after his internment by the Gestapo during World War II is probably the most outstanding example of love and service to others in recent times, recorded the following observation in his classic publication, “Man’s search for Meaning”:

“A man who becomes conscious of the responsibility he bears toward a human being, who affectionately waits for him, or to an unfinished work, can never throw away his life. He knows the ‘why’ for his existence, and will be able to wait for the ‘how’.”

Frankl found that wherever he traveled in the world, men can be readily divided into two separate and distinct classes irrespective of race, religion or social status. On the one hand, there are those who are guided by greed and personal self-gratification and a desire to acquire all they can, in complete disregard of the hopes, needs and expectation of others. While the other is a group motivated by a love for others and a desire to protect and support as much as possible. Unlike the former group, they are not content to stand by while others are in need, and will do whatever needed, even without being asked. The members of this latter group, whose names and reputations have embellished the history books throughout the centuries, are defined by the values and the principles they lived by, and not by the monuments that may or may not bear their names. These are the people who make a difference in the world.

         One of the great tragedies of life is that so many people spend all their lives without ever experiencing the joy and satisfaction of living a life that makes a difference. They were too busy living the sort of life that society expected of them, and were so consumed with trying to please a few people at all cost, that they had no time to find their own fulfillment. Even more tragic is the fact that quite often they do this without intention, but out of ignorance because they were never given the opportunity to know or do better. Modern society with its determined drive to succeed more, to acquire more, to build more and to compete more, fails to recognize that the true, lasting rewards do not lie in the taking or accumulating, but rather in the giving and in the sharing. That true success is measured less by results and more by effect on others. This, and only this, is what makes the difference, and everything else in life are merely window dressings.

This to me is the real shame of modern societies, with all their great advancements in knowledge, opportunity and conveniences. Instead of developing forward, man has indeed devolved backwards to the animal thinking. Instead of sharing the blessings and making a difference to the lives of all members, man has chosen to grab and horde, while others are left wanting. All of this, in the name of progress!

 What a shame that we are not courageous enough to take up our responsibilities and follow the right path in living. Perhaps we should take heed of those fine words recorded by the late Robert P. Kennedy on the night he was tragically killed by a disturbed Sirhan Sirhan:

“Each time a man stands up for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he sends forth a tiny ripple of hope, crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring those ripples to build a current which can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance.”

Instead of a current of goodwill sweeping away the mighty walls of oppression and resistance, we are choosing to build walls, restrict freedoms and use religion as a reason to kill and destroy.

-And tragically, we proudly claim to do this in the name of civilization!

LIFE AND DEATH

Death, like love is patient.

 Though, it is rarely kind and never proud!

                                                   

These words were recorded by Christopher Sabga an aspiring writer trying to find his way in the literary world. They relate to his personal experiences over his young lifetime in which he savored the threat of possible death on at least two separate occasions. And also, to the power and the patience of a determined and loving family who fought hand-in-hand to keep it from succeeding. He knows that death is inevitable, and it is just waiting for the right moment. But he also knows that his love of life is a formidable foe, that will never give up for as long it can.

But death is indeed inevitable. In fact, the only certainty we have in life is that it will end. This is an irrefutable fact for every single living being on earth, irrespective of it being plant or animal, and one that must be accepted by all. The only difference however is that the human species is the only one that devotes time, effort and energy contemplating the prospect of dying and searching for ways of thwarting death’s ultimate power. A few even insist that this power will some day be overcome and death will not be an option anymore.

Indeed, there is no shortage of people who question the certainty of death taking place. Some confidently argue this on the basis of the finding that since the start of the 19^th century to the present, the average human life has increased by about 4 hours per day (or 2 months per year) over the 200 year span without showing any sign of a plateau. Because of this, they insist that immortality will eventually occur sometime in the distant future, simply by the continuing process of natural progression. There are others who postulate that as science continues to advance, and the hidden mechanisms of cellular life is better understood, together with the rapid growth of replaceable parts that will soon become fully available, then it would not be unreasonable to assume that the body can be kept going indefinitely.  Again others are convinced that cryogenic methods when they are fully developed will be used to successfully sustain life forever.

But these explanations as well as the myriad of other exotic attempts to persuade people against the fact of death’s inevitability are, to my mind, merely examples of misguided or wishful thinking. The fundamental truth is that even taking into account the remarkable social, medical and technological advances which have resulted in successfully pushing the average age of survival to levels never dreamed of only a century ago, there will come a time when it reaches so high that it may be more of a curse than a blessing for the majority of people. When one considers that the cell DNA, the fundamental building blocks of life, have their own built-in degradation cycles which inevitably leads to disintegration and death, it is not unreasonable to predict that the successful extension of life will come with a serious price to be paid in the subsequent quality of life. Clearly, a longer life is not necessarily a happier one if the extra years are spent in pain or suffering, or in progressive mental or physical disintegration or in loneliness and isolation. These are all questions that have yet to be answered!

         Whatever final outcome we accept, we cannot ignore the undeniable fact that we will die and not might die. The only question that remains to be answered is what should be done with the period of time we spend living on earth. Clearly, our choice of behavior will be deeply dependent on our attitude toward what happens after death has taken place. Those who believe that death is the end, will have nothing to achieve but instant gratification of the present. But those who believe that life continues on in some form subsequently, will view life in the context of the hereafter.

 It is not surprising therefore that for as long as there has been recorded history people have chosen to live their lives based entirely on how they perceived the future. The various approaches adopted, however different, were based primarily on this premise of everlasting life. For example, the great Greek philosopher, Socrates, considered to be the father of Western Philosophy, was adamant in his belief that death must not be feared, when he wrote:

‘To fear death, gentlemen, is nothing other than to think oneself wise when one is not. For it is to think that one knows what one does not know. No person knows whether death may not even turn out to be the greatest of blessings for a human being and yet people fear it as if they knew for certain that it is the greatest of evils.’

And several millennia later, Nelson Mandela, the great anti-apartheid revolutionary and first President of the unified South Africa, was more concerned with the reward he will receive after death for the life he led, when he observed:

“Death is something inevitable. When a man has done what he considers to be his duty to his people and his country, he can rest in peace, I believe I have made the effort and that I therefore, will sleep well for eternity.”

These are but two contrasting examples of the wide spectrum of man’s view of death as it relates to life. A spectrum that appears to be continuous from one of fear and rejection of the unknown on the one end, to one of eager and optimistic anticipation for the rewards that lay beyond the barrier for a life well spent, on the other end. Each person’s position, like the life he led while he was alive, will be different and depend entirely on their belief structure during life. But irrespective of one’s personal beliefs, it is clear that unless one views life as a Nihilistic person would, without objective meaning, intrinsic value or purpose, then he must see death being included as an integral part of living.

 To me, death must never be seen as an event separate from life, but like other events in nature such as: day and night, hot and cold or the changing seasons, death must be seen as a stage in the expression of life on earth and deserves as much attention as any other of the various stages in living. It is for this reason that my personal belief that life is a journey that begins in eternity and ends in eternity must include the concept of death being part of, and not different from, the rest of life. The great Lebanese-American poet and author, Khalil Gibran, in a simple but eloquently inspired observation left no doubt what this means when he wrote:

“For life and death are one, even as the river and sea are one.”

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WATCH YOUR THOUGHTS

“The world we have created is a product of our thoughts;

It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.”

         These words by Albert Einstein, the outstanding German-born American Nobel laureate whose brilliant scientific and non-scientific works have qualified him as a genius, speak to the enormous power of our thoughts in our life.

         Most of us treat our thoughts as ‘passing visitors’ in our minds, without ever recognizing that the thoughts you express in words and the actions that result, determine the person you are, and the life you live. Whether at an unconscious level or by intention, once thoughts are formulated and released they carry with them certain definitive consequences which can forever affect us positively or negatively, in every aspect of our life.

         An ancient Chinese proverb that has been around for thousands of years and used in countless settings throughout the ages is still one of the most effective tools to serve to remind us of the sequence of the effects that thoughts have on subsequent behavior.  In a few simple steps, it traces the stages beginning with the thought and leading ultimately to the expression of one’s destiny:

“Be careful of your thoughts; your thoughts become your words.

 Be careful of your words; your words become your actions.

 Be careful of your actions; your actions become your habits.

 Be careful of your habits; your habits become your character.

 Be careful of your character, your character becomes your destiny.”

These wonderful and explicit words are as relevant today as they were over the previous millennia of human civilization. They have stood the test of time without change or modification. They trace in clear, demonstrable sequence the effect of our thoughts which generate words that can result in action. This action, if left unchecked, will develop into habits. Habits are the foundation of character, which ultimately will determine your destiny. 

         The message from this sequence relates specifically to the dynamic power held by our thoughts and the need to constantly keep them in check, so that we can ensure and secure our destiny. Equally, Buddha, the ancient Indian ascetic, whose teachings formed the foundation of Buddhism, recorded the following observation:

“What we think, we become.

All that we are, arises from our thoughts.

With our thoughts, we make the world.” 

And the Holy Bible, written many centuries later, is equally clear when, in Proverbs 4:23, the faithful are warned:

“Be careful how you think;

Your life is shaped by your thoughts.”

Our life is a perfect reflection of our thoughts, our beliefs and our attitude. All our actions, positive or negative, have their beginning from thoughts generated within us and converted into action. In the same context, every effect that we experience on the outside will also have a response within us. Because there are no random events in nature that can be ignored as inconsequential, it is incumbent on everyone to exercise every effort to maintain access of their thought processes and to actively learn how to control them and to direct them in the direction that will provide the greatest benefit. By doing this, they will ensure maximum benefit to their life, avoid unnecessary disappointments and failures. This will also ensure the optimum benefit to their life and ultimately, their destiny.

         William Shakespeare, perhaps the greatest English playwright of all times wrote, in his undoubtedly finest tragedy Julius Caesar, a comment which is considered among the most potent observations on human behavior ever recorded, when he noted:

“It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in ourselves.”

The truth of the statement will surely resonate with every generation of humanity as it faces its conflicts with its thoughts.

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SEARCHING FOR SUCCESS

“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself. Do not go out and look for a successful person and duplicate him.”

These words of advice were recorded by Professor Stephen Hawking, the world renowned, British theoretical physicist, whose work on quantum physics and general relativity has revolutionized scientific thinking. He is a specially gifted man who has achieved the very highest pinnacle of professional success despite being a severe victim of ALS since he was 21 years old. The disease has rendered him severely debilitated, confined permanently to a wheelchair and able to communicate only with the help of a sophisticated computer and the movement of a single cheek muscle. But this has not interfered with him leading a full personal and professional life including having a family and recently indicating an intention to travel to outer space. The quotation has always impressed me as a genuinely profound advice that can be given to anyone in search of his personal success. It is the one that I have passed on to each of my children and continue to remind them of its validity.

Far too often, we tend to accept the popular view that the term success should be reserved for those people who have achieved materialistic or personality dominance, and whose names appear constantly before us. The tendency is to essentially focus mainly on those ‘successful’ people who have achieved public attention and notoriety, such as those in sport and in the popular entertainment media, as well as the financially successful ones who are able to project themselves and their varied achievements to the public. But however much these people deserve the recognition and the accompanying accolades, let us never believe that true success belongs exclusively to these few. In fact, every person who has chosen his road to success and who has set out on the journey and has achieved the results he sought is undoubtedly a success. For in order for him to have achieved his goal, he would have had to harness his inner dreams, expend his energies, confront his failures and move beyond his comfort zone.

 To my mind the success attained by Warren Buffett or Jeff  Bezos in building their wonderful business empires, as brilliant, magical and mind-boggling as they may be, is not qualitatively different from that of the small neighborhood pizza shop-owner who started on a hope and a shoe-string to obtain a better life for his family. Or for that matter, is there any fundamental difference between the joy and success experienced by Usain Bolt winning the Olympic 100 meter gold medal and the handicapped young man who triumphed in the 100 meters sprint finals at the World Special Olympics held in the same venue, shortly after.

         True Success indeed, has always been in the eyes of the beholder. It has nothing to do with trying to build a bigger ego and even less in trying to impress more people; -this type of success is artificial and egotistic. But it has everything to do with the deep-seated desire of an individual to achieve the goal he set for himself, however small or large that may be, and ultimately to achieve the satisfaction and happiness of completion. This to me is the real meaning of success and the one that people strive to achieve constantly. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow, one of America’s greatest and most successful men of letters very effectively placed the true concept of success in the following context:

“The talent of success is nothing more than doing what you can do, well. And doing well whatever you do, without thought of fame. If it comes at all, it will come because it is deserved, not because it is sought after.”

The examples of successful people that have crossed my path in my life- time are countless in numbers. Their names and faces are equally countless and their stories are all different and varied, but in each one of them the message remains the same. A message that was so beautifully incorporated in Lance Armstrong’s own fundamental motto of:

“Looking at every obstacle as an opportunity,

 Always working as hard as one can, and

 Never accepting that anything is impossible.” 

         In the end, after all is said and done, perhaps Ralph Waldo Emerson, the great American essayist, lecturer, poet and philosopher who lived during most of the nineteenth century, deserves to have the last word when he recorded his views on success in the following observation:

“To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to leave the world a better place, to know that even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.”

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FINDING HAPPINESS

“People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness. Just because they’re not on your road doesn’t mean they’ve gotten lost.”

The above quotation by the well-respected and very successful author and inspirational speaker, H. Jackson Brown, Jr. speaks to the fundamentally complex nature of the human expression of happiness, and our inability to understand it.

The main difficulty in understanding is that, like all the basic emotional expressions, happiness cannot be defined or quantified, and at best, it can only be recognized by its effects on the individual. And even these may vary quite substantially from person to person depending on the prevailing circumstances. In addition, the expression of happiness to be effective must also include other components as hope, fulfillment and satisfaction in good amounts. But when it is successful, it invariably gives rise to feelings of contentment and joy in the individual and a desire to continue on the same path.

There have been extensive studies and much written on the causes and effects of these feelings but as expected, these have produced many different explanations without definitive conclusions. The clinical responses can be demonstrated physiologically by studying the release of endorphins and dopamine in the brain. These can in fact be measured and can reproduce feelings of happiness. On the other hand, the Psychologist and Behaviorist confidently explain feelings of happiness as basic conditioned responses that result from the need to be rewarded. And to the deeply religious person, happiness comes from achieving closeness to God.

But whatever the etiological factors in operation, happiness is never a continuous feature of life. True happiness comes generally, in small fleeting moments which require constant reinforcement or else, it will quickly fade away. Genuine, lasting happiness will only be achieved after we learn how to reach and hold-on to those moments. And when we do, life becomes an adventure full of continuous happy, contented moments of enjoying the rewards of these feelings. Mahatma Gandhi, the great Indian-born humanitarian, and father of the civil-rights movement in India, very beautifully described this stage of happiness in these simple but exquisite terms: “When what you think, what you say, and what you do are in complete harmony.” This to me is a truly inspired assessment of the expression of genuine happiness. It refers to that state where the inner and outer being has achieved true harmony giving rise to feelings of contentment, joy and satisfaction.          

The great American novelist Nathaniel Hawthorne once very eloquently noted in his writings, the following observation:

"Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, it may alight upon you."

It is this sense of confidence in oneself and in one’s choices that dictates the predictability of happiness, and it is the expectation that the reward will always come in the form of fulfilled dreams, joy and desires. It is having the confidence to believe that it will always be there if one persists in the endeavor. It is indeed the main force that encourages you to stay on your road and not waver. This will only happen however, if we are patient enough to allow happiness to take place.

Unfortunately, for a large number of people, especially those caught in this consumer-oriented society with its raging currents of modern civilization and its determined undercurrents of selfishness and competition, happiness equates to the next acquisition, the next conquest or the next compliment. But these material objects serve only to enhance a false sense satisfaction, like a coat of cheap paint that quickly fades. They do not, nor can they ever be compared with the deep sense of joy and satisfaction emanating from the depth of your soul for sharing yourself with others.

 Bill Gates recently resoundingly reaffirmed this feeling in an address directed especially to the college graduates of 2017 when describing his own measure of happiness in the following terms:

“I measure my happiness by whether people close to me are happy and love me, and by the difference I make in other people’s lives.” 

-There was no mention of his enviably immense reputation, the highly successful companies he built, the mansions he owned, nor the billions of dollars he is worth; only of the difference he made on other people’s lives. This indeed is a true hallmark of happiness and one that will endear him for as long as he is alive.

Unfortunately however, in our determined haste to find happiness, many of us have sacrificed its true meaning on the altar of personal convenience. No longer do we seem to recognize that, while the emotion of happiness is itself fleeting, its effect on us is as lasting as the depth of meaning we attach to it. How can one ever compare the happiness shown on the radiant, smiling face of St. Teresa of Kolkata as she ministered to the most destitute and rejected inhabitant of India’s pavements, with the grinning, gloating image of Donald J. Trump after his success at the recent presidential elections? Or for that matter, is there any comparison between the joy and pride experienced by a teacher receiving recognition from her school board, and that of the young woman’s applause for exposing her body and her morals on TV? The answer to both these is loud and clear!

In the end, living the happy life and pursuing happiness is not, as so many people try to insist, a matter of luck, circumstances or opportunity. It is more correctly related to one’s attitude, intention and willingness to make the effort and take the appropriate steps in their lives to achieve happiness. As Earnest Hemingway, the controversial American author, journalist and Nobel Laureate, so wisely concluded: 

“Every man’s life ends the same way. It is only in the details of how he lived that distinguishes one man from another.”

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