Friday, September 28, 2018

IN SEARCH OF A FREE SPIRIT


“Born free, as free as the wind blows,
as free as the grass grows;
-Born free to follow your heart.”

These memorable words form part of the chorus of the very popular and multiple award-winning song of the same name, which was composed by John Barry and Don Black and published in 1966. The song was originally part of a very successful movie that followed the lives of a couple in Africa who had adopted an orphaned lioness and helped the animal to return to the freedom of life in the jungle. But it did not take long before this beautiful song came to be identified with everything to do with the freedom of man’s spirit and the accompanying need for him to be free, especially against society’s increasing tendency to institute rules and regulations designed to maintain conformity.

Jean-Jacques Rousseau, the great Genevan philosopher, social critic and author, drew attention to this developing concern more than 300 years ago when he introduced his ground-breaking treatise on philosophy and social reform entitled “The Social Contract” with the following observation:

“Man is born free, but everywhere he is in chains.”

He suggested that man in his original habitat was, like any other animal, living his life happily engaged in satisfying his urges and his desires when the need arose, but not concerned about collecting or keeping anything he has no use for. To Rousseau’s mind, the original man, born free, was able to fully live his life fulfilling his needs completely with everything he desired, without any reason or intent for anything he did not need or have use for the moment. He lived his life only to satisfy his immediate needs without any interest in trying to impact others in any way. He was, as the words of the song noted, “free to follow his heart.”

But with the gradual advent of society, with its rules and its regulations designed to assure conformity, man has moved gradually to relinquish this free spirit of satisfying his needs only, and not hoarding the rest, into a more competitive and aggressive instinct of not only exacting his own needs, but also seeking other things he did not need in order to exert power and control over others. Motivated by this desire to satisfy his convenience and comfort, he relinquished his sacred responsibility to live free, and has willingly accepted group subjectivity with all the accompanying hardships and unhappiness; and being convinced that this action was for his own interest and enhancement. In this way, under the guise of interest to maintain uniformity and stability, the world constantly tries to curb the very essence of the free spirit and reduce it to the level of conformity. This development has led the very well respected American journalist, essayist and cultural critic, H, R. Mencken, to very effectively and correctly describe the end result of society’s influence in these terms:

“It seems to me that society always wins. There are, to be sure, free spirits in the world, but their freedom, in the last analysis, is not much greater than that of canaries in a cage. They may flap their wings and sing, but they are still in a cage, and sooner or later the cage will conquer them.”

            But even in today’s society, beset by a whole variety of rules, laws, controls and traditions, free spirits abound and are the driving forces for all the good changes that take place. They are the people who dream dreams of better things, and then try to implement them, without being concerned about what others think or what they believe. They do everything within their power to avoid coming under controls, rules and restrictions, preferring to find their own path and walk to the beat of their own drum. Their passion for life is overflowing as is their dreams to live it to the fullest. They have an insatiable drive to explore new frontiers, to challenge old ideas and experiences, and discover the wonders of life. They prefer to live in the moment and eagerly engage with people, places and things around them in their search for answers. They avoid the trap that so many of their peers fall into, of developing a self-ego, and spending their life doing everything solely to impress others. Unlike the superficial and subservient approach that others find convenient, to a genuine free spirit, the thoughts, beliefs and behavior emanate from a source deeply embedded in their spirit and remain an insatiable and driving force to finding success after success. An author whose name I do not recall very effectively described this person in the following manner:

“He is a person who lives according to his own rules, wishes and beliefs, unconstrained by society’s conventions.  He is a person with a highly individual or unique attitude, lifestyle and imagination.”

         In this modern era, we are witnessing a great surge in the global expression of people of free spirit determined to do what they can to change the world. This rapid surge in entrepreneurs that has been NDS$occurring, all of whom willingly venturing away from the established standards and norms and deviating from society’s rules and customs into the unknown, could only have been achieved by individuals with the strength of character and confidence of personality to challenge the status quo and choose their own path. Steve Jobs, perhaps one of the freest spirit of all, described this best in his unique way when he addressed the graduating class at Stamford university in 2005 and said:

“While some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world, are the ones who do.”

         But such a free spirit is by no means limited to these relatively few people whose efforts change the world. It is present in every setting and every walk of life and living. All it requires is the vision of a need, a conviction to change and the courage to proceed. I have no doubt whatsoever that every one of us will have no difficulty to recall many examples of friends and acquaintances who have exhibited actions that can only be described as free spirited. My earliest personal encounter occurred at an early age. It involved a family of free spirited individuals whose father was a close friend of my father. Very early in my life I became aware that his children were extremely talented people whose life exuded the type of confidence and optimism that can only be seen among people of free spirit. Even at a very early age, Boscoe and Geoffrey Holder were accomplished dancers, artists and painters with personalities that were as free as the very wind itself. Their careers eventually carried them from the small Caribbean island of their birth to the highest pinnacles in the world of art and entertainment and gave them international recognition. A fact that they understood and freely acknowledged as this quotation by Geoffrey clearly demonstrates:

“We are too quick to put labels on things. It is my profession. I get up and paint. Everyone wants to put a label on it. But I am a free spirit, so I fight against it.”

         This to me, is the hallmark of a genuine free spirit. A freedom that allows us to give free rein to everything we think, say or do to satisfy our dreams and our needs. One that allows us to do so, while allowing others the opportunity to be free. It demands a degree of morality and maturity to allow others the freedom to express themselves with equal vigor and energy, without the urge to curb or discourage. It certainly does not imply the possession of any exclusive type of endowment or special capability in the individual, but rather a freedom to do things that satisfy their own personal needs without impinging on the needs of others. Professor Stephen Hawking, the great English theoretical physicist and world renowned cosmologist, who achieved phenomenal success all over the world, even as he suffered from advanced debilitating disease. He was a superb example of a person who successfully lived a full and rewarding life giving full expression of his free spirit. When asked, the secret of his success he unhesitatingly replied:
My advice to other disabled people would be: concentrate on things that your disability does not prevent you from doing well, and don’t regret the things it interferes with. Don’t be disabled in spirit as well as physically.”
This indeed is the finest advice that can be offered to anyone in search of their free spirit. It will never be found in the eyes of another, but can only be found deep in searcher’s soul after all the external debris has been lifted.


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Friday, September 21, 2018

FACING THE TRUTH




“You will know the truth,
and the truth will set you free.”
           
            This very basic and fundamental advice is contained in the Holy Bible in John chapter 8, verse 32. It is to my mind, one of the most important messages delivered to us by Jesus Christ, yet unfortunately one of the most neglected by mankind. It is a message to which very few people give anything but passing acknowledgment in their daily living, but yet one which represents their most important salvation not only in the present life, but equally after they have departed.

         By far the hardest truth anyone of us will ever want to face is the truth about ourselves. We all, with the possible exception of a very few exceptionally endowed people, will not hesitate to do whatever we can to keep from facing the hard truth about ourselves. It is so much easier, and more rewarding, to pretend that we are whom we think we should be, and do our very best to get others to agree with us. No one will deny that it is never an easy undertaking to freely accept the truth from others, and then having to deal with the exposed weaknesses and the failures that result. We are always eager to receive rewards for what we think we have accomplished, and even happier to project them to others, but much more reluctant to accept being told the truth when we fail. We seem determined to ignore the unquestionable fact that the truth is the way things actually are, not the way we think they ought to be or wished they should be. Carl Jung, the eminent Swiss physician, psychiatrist and one of the founders of the school of psycho-analysis very clearly understood and applied this in treating his patients, when he would remind them:

“People will do anything, no matter how absurd, to avoid facing there own souls.”

Most people believe that the reason someone avoids facing the truth is to deliberately distort or deceive their true images, and project   more favorable ones instead. But this is very far from being correct. The real truth is that people actually try to avoid facing the truth much more out of a deep subconscious inability to cope with their own insecurities, and the fears of what will follow in the resulting fallout. Quite often, the action is undertaken quite impulsively, without knowledge or intent. To accept the truth implies a willingness to expose one’s deepest fears and weaknesses to the full glare of scrutiny. It requires a degree of security and confidence enough to withstand the criticisms and ridicules of others, while defending one’s own positions. It means also having the courage to recognize that in doing so, they may be wrong and that their ‘truth’ was in need of correction. Oprah Winfrey, one of America’s most successful female entrepreneurs, TV host and actress, recognized this fact very early in her career and made full use of it in building her enviable empire. On many occasions in discussions she will often make reference to the following quotation:

“The thing you fear most has no power.
Your fear of it is what has the power.
Facing the truth really will set you free.”

But facing the truth is never an easy task for any one of us to undertake, even under the most favorable conditions possible. From its very inception, the human race has survived and flourished on the basic principle of unrelenting change and competition, and the principle of survival of the fittest. This demanded the development of defense mechanisms designed far more to impress and to protect the   individual and ensure its survival, and far less to reveal possible flaws or weaknesses. This necessitated the need to learn to project the images of confidence and worthiness while denying as much as possible, any appearance of weakness or of susceptibility. It is not surprising therefore that most people will reflexively take whatever action they can to avoid having to face any negative impact on their self-image, and certainly resist any truth that may do so.

Hearing the truth about yourself being told to others therefore is a very difficult undertaking under any circumstances for anyone to accept. This is especially so for the majority of people who spend all their lives diligently trying to construct ‘falsehoods’ to shield them-selves from the pain and disappointments of failing, and who have carefully molded ‘images’ of who they think they should be. To risk losing this and expose themselves to the possibility of destroying all the fantasies they spent so many years developing, is something that few of them are able to summon the courage to do. To compound this, very few people indeed are ever ready to throw out their established ideas and be willing to accept other more contradictory ideas, just because they are told these are true. Friedrich Nietzche, the great German philosopher, poet and cultural critic, whose works have exerted very strong influence on Western philosophy, summarized this vey neatly when he observed:

“People don’t want to hear the truth, because they don’t want their illusions destroyed.”
      
       Even with the very best intentions, people who have spent most of their lives believing in a certain image of themselves and who are determined to maintain this image in order to shield themselves from being judged, humiliated or ridiculed, will find it an almost impossible task to accept the truth. But even more than this, is the undeniable fact that most people, for a variety of reasons, do not or cannot handle the truth about themselves. The immortal words uttered in open court by Colonel Jessop, in the famous court scene in the 1992 cinematic masterpiece by Aaron Sorkin:A Few Good Men” actually spoke very clearly to all of us when he challenged us with the statement:

“You want the truth!?
You can’t handle the truth!”

Nobody wants to be told that their lives are going wrong because of their own doing or thinking, and no one ever enjoys being criticized and ridiculed for saying “No” when they should be saying “Yes.” And even when we do recognize that we are deliberately trying to avoid having to face the truth, it takes a great deal of effort and soul-searching to persuade ourselves to correct the action

         Perhaps the most prominent example of people’s reaction on being told the truth in recent times occurred in 1995 following the successful overthrow of the Apartheid regime in South Africa by Nelson Mandela. A Truth and Reconciliation Commission under the co-chairmanship of the highly respected Archbishop Desmond Tutu was set up to specifically bring out the truth of all the atrocities that had been committed, with the hope of healing the nation. After 2 years, more than 15,000 testimonies and over 3,500 pages of published   information presented in open court with access to everyone, the final results produced only moderately positive changes in attitude, but unfortunately a general agreement that “the levels of distress and anger correlated inversely with subsequent forgiveness.” Although the results were helpful to the health of the new nation, it was not as helpful to the health of the individual victims, especially those who were subjected to hearing the truth about themselves from others and trying to defend their actions.

         Most people are able to hide the risk of having to face the horrendous truths about themselves by concealing them behind walls of excuses which they concoct and believe. They will then do anything they can think of to keep them covered not only from others, but even from themselves. The recent example of this was seen when Dr. Larry  Nassar, a highly respected Team physician for the successful US Olympic gymnastic team who was recently accused and found guilty of abusing more than 300 female gymnasts under his care. He initially vehemently denied the allegation of deliberate abuse, believing and defending the fact, that he “considered vaginal penetration was part of his medical treatment.” Unfortunately this type of behavior is by no means unique and limited to a few distorted people. In fact, in one way or another, everyone of us are guilty of trying to hide anything we consider might be unacceptable truths under blankets of deceit, and then hope that no one will find them. We have yet to learn the truth of that immortal statement by an unknown author that simply but very correctly notes:

“You can run with a lie, but you can’t hide from the truth.
Sooner or later, it will catch you.”

But merely recognizing the lie we tell ourselves and then facing up to the truth that we have been avoiding for so long is never an easy task nor is it ever enough by itself to correct the situation. The world overflows with examples of people giving lip service to the idea of facing the truth, while continuing to reap their rewards from continued deception. One has only to look at activities of so many of the world’s leaders in any aspect of life, whether religious, politics, information, finance, legal or business, to see that in most instances, their ‘truth’ is what suits them or is most convenient to them. Many people are convinced that this deliberate distortion of truth to accommodate personal aims and achievements is the fundamental engine that drives civilization. As, for that matter, are the activities of so many of us who find ourselves having to justify actions that are strictly not truthful, but rewarding nevertheless. It brings to mind that often repeated quote on the definition of truth for which no source has been identified:

There are always three sides to any story; Mine, Yours, and the Real Truth.”

Buddha, in his teachings, always insisted that however we tried,p “there are only three things that cannot be hidden: the sun, the moon and the truth.” Facing the truth that we have been avoiding for whatever reason whatsoever, is the only way there is to look at our self in a mirror and see our true self reflecting back. This is the surest way to find out who you really are, and to stand firm and proud of the real image that is showing. By recognizing the lies we tell ourselves and others, and at the same time finding the courage to admit to them, we will go a long way to healing ourselves and relinquishing the need to build elaborate defenses to protect us from the truth. But Buddha himself, in his eminent wisdom, warned us of the dangers of doing so without being fully prepared to go all the way, when he warned:

There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way and not starting.”

W. Clement Stone, the extremely successful American businessman, philanthropist and inspirational author, who’s beginning   from a very underprivileged background to attain national prominence, is a testament of his belief in the truth, never hesitated to declare his belief on this requisite for success by declaring:

“Have the courage to say no. Have the courage to face the truth. Do the right thing, because it’s the right thing to do.
These are the magic keys to living your life with integrity.”

-The greatest reason for not being able to face our truths is the fear we   hold in our hearts that we are somehow unworthy to be who we are. But if we firmly believe that we are chosen children of God, made in his own image, there can be no reason whatsoever to question ourselves and our courage to always face the truth.


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Friday, September 14, 2018

THE REALITY OF FEAR



“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark.
The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” 

          These words, by the ancient Greek philosopher Plato, who is
considered by most people to be one of the founders of modern Western Philosophy, go directly to the impact of fear on human life. In this very brief statement he drew clear and unequivocal attention to the differences experienced by a child who lacks knowledge and therefore is afraid of the unknown, and the adult who is fully aware of the circumstances, yet chooses to act with fear and trepidation.

To a newborn child every experience is new and unknown, and as a result it feels instinctively engulfed with fear. Every change in its milieu which is different, triggers a cry for help and its only recourse to dealing with this is to turn to the comfort of the familiar security touch of the adult. But as the child grows, gains more knowledge and is exposed more frequently to threatening experiences, it gains more confidence and shows better acceptance. And as the child acquires more information and more exposure, this understanding improves and the blanket of fear gradually recedes and is replaced by reason, knowledge and logic. Under the right conditions fear in effect is replaced by confidence and even more, a willingness to step into the unknown; which explains the impetuous actions so familiar among youth.
        
         But Fear is vital in terms of its importance to the individual’s psyche and normal body function. It is in fact a natural defense mechanism, a basic primal emotion, that is the key to the evolutionary survival of the species. It is already dominant long before the other emotions develop, with a demonstrable center in the amygdala of the brain and an integral involvement in the body’s responses. It is found deeply embedded in the individual’s psyche and is the body’s major way of issuing a warning of possible danger. It is also the body’s avenue to initiate a response for action by preparing for “fight or flight’ and creating the appropriate mental, cardiac, respiratory and musculoskeletal changes to deal with any impending situations. In many ways, it can be seen as the crucial mechanism that the body relies on to protect it when it finds itself in potentially hazardous waters.

         This however, was by no means the fear that Plato was referring to in his observation. He was referring to the tendency of people to respond to stimulation with irrational and excessive fear reactions completely out of proportion to the perceived threat. It is this totally unwarranted and unreasonable thinking that triggers a maladaptive response giving rise to overwhelming stress and negative behaviors. Whenever this happens, we set in motion a series of psychologically complex activities in the brain, causing changes that may affect the psyche and alter our perception. Not only is the individual affected in his immediate response, but they act as future triggers to repeat the action when faced with similar situations, real or imagined, that may arise. We become victims of our own doing as Leslie Calvin (Les) Brown the highly successful African-American motivational speaker and author, so wisely noted:

"Too many of us are not living our Dreams, 
  because we are living our Fears."

In this state, with our psyche rendered vulnerable, we begin to use the developing fear as an excuse, to look back at ways to avoid past experiences rather than looking forward to find ways and means to neutralize it. Instead of facing our fears as we should, we become masters of self-deception and spend the time finding excuses, while being fully aware of the price we are paying. This indeed is The Reality of Living with Fear and accepting the “monster” whose only concern is to reinforce pain and disappointment and render the individuals as slaves to their emotions. The profound tragedy is that in the greatest majority of examples, the victim is fully aware that the behavior is unacceptable and unproductive, and more often than not, knows ways to correct it. But he suffers from a paralysis that totally overwhelms his psyche. This indeed is what Plato so eloquently described as “the real tragedy of life” and what an Unknown Author took pain to explain with some examples of cause and effect:

“You are not scared of the dark; you are scared of what’s in it.
You are not afraid of people around you; you are afraid of rejection.
You are not afraid of loving; you are afraid of not being love in return.
You are not afraid to let go; you are afraid to accept the truth she’s gone.
You are not afraid to try again; you are afraid of being hurt again.”

         It is against this background that the giving in to fear must be viewed. Fear must never ever be looked at, as many tend to do, as the absence of courage. In fact, as Bruce Lee, the accomplished Chinese-American actor and Kung-Fu exponent quite rightly observed:

“Courage is never the absence of fear.
It is the ability to act in the presence of fear.”

As stated previously, fear is an integral component in the body’s defense mechanism, without which it would not be able to anticipate and deal with any threat to its survival. It becomes a serious problem only when the response is completely out of proportion to the prevailing condition. When fear has lost it real purpose, and has turned its anger inward and when instead of protecting the individual it becomes an enemy intent on destruction, then and only then it can be considered as a tragedy to life. In this state, it can influence every possible aspect of human thought and behavior rendering the individual a helpless slave to its falsehoods. One only has to look at the enormous combination of presentations that result from the anxieties, phobias and disturbed behaviors to determine its hold on humanity. The reality is that it most often succeeds because the victims find it extremely difficult to break away, remaining locked in their self-made prisons by their own fears. 
Thich Nhat Hanh, the internationally recognized Vietnamese Buddhist monk residing in France, summarized this finding most appropriately when he noted:

“People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer a suffering that is familiar.”

The real tragedy of life for these unfortunate victims is that all but a few, never succeed in completely breaking the chain of fear that binds them, and are condemned to live out their lives, never fully able to share in all the joys and blessings of happy living.

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Friday, September 7, 2018

THE JOY OF FORGIVENESS




“Forgiving is not something you do for someone else. It is something you do for yourself. It is saying: You are not important enough to have a stranglehold on me. You don’t get to trap me in the past. I am worthy of a future. I am moving on to peace and happiness.”

This simplistic observation recorded by Jodi Picoult, the award winning American writer, fully explains the power that not forgiving another person can have on one’s own psyche, and stresses the need for direct corrective action to ensure a return peace and contentment.

In my recently published book, “Life is for the Living”, I referred to the act of not forgiving as “a disease which inevitably affects the mind and body of all concerned, and that to forgive is as therapeutic, as it is blessed.” This to me is fundamental, and must be absolutely followed if we want to avoid the many pitfalls in living life. Far too many of us spend most of our lives locked in a jail of our own making, deliberately choosing to walk down that lonely road of anger, distrust and painful remembrance, without realizing that we are the major victims and the biggest losers, every single time. And even more tragically, we continue to do so in spite of the fact that we may be fully aware of the damage being done to ourselves and our relationships.

No one is ever immune from being hurt from the words and actions delivered by others. Whether done by accident or by deliberate intent to hurt and embarrass, these can leave open wounds of anger and bitterness which may often cry out for vengeance. And far too often our immediate ‘human’ response is the lash out in righteous indignation; denying the event and seeking retribution. But whenever we do this however, we fail to remember that such action does far more harm to us than it ever does to the intended individual. Dwelling on the hurts and disappointments will inevitably give rise to increasing feelings of resentment, suspicion, hostility and even to thoughts of vengeance which can quickly take hold, crowding out any chance for reason and understanding appearing. In the end, the individual becomes swallowed up by his own feelings of bitterness and resentment, and driven to seek punishment and retribution at any cost.

Such actions however, only serve to disturb the fundamental harmony in the individual’s personal life, giving rise to anger and bitterness in every one of his existing relationship, and increasing the difficulty in forming new ones. The intense disappointment experienced can quickly translates into a loss of meaning and purpose in life, giving rise to symptoms of depression, anxiety, reduced self worth and ultimately a negative change in personality. If this is allowed to continue uncorrected it will spread to infect every aspect of the individual’s living, his relationships with others, his family and the world around him. In short, he risks losing his fundamental joy of living! Dave Willis, a popular American actor and musician summarized this effect simply but very effectively when he noted:

“Holding a grudge does not make you strong; It makes you bitter. Forgiving does not make you weak: It sets you free!”

       Forgiveness is a gift we hand ourselves at a time of distress, and until we realize that we owe this to ourselves, and that not doing so, will result in our inevitable emotional and physical harm leading to a life of interminable misery. Although it means different things to different people, forgiving involves a conscious effort of deciding to release any thoughts of resentment or retribution toward the offending person. This action leads immediately to feelings of understanding, empathy and even compassion directed toward others who caused the hurt or pain experienced and allows the victims to free themselves from the self-imposed control of others. It does not necessarily require forgetting or excusing the action, (although that would be a most desirable aim), but it does mean letting go of one’s personal feelings of regret and resentment. Rodney King, the Los Angeles taxi driver who in 1991 was a victim of a near fatal, severe physical abuse by members of the city’s police that led to one of the largest, destructive riots in America, subsequently showed true and genuine forgiveness when in a somewhat unsophisticated but genuinely heartfelt words, he uttered:

‘As far as having peace within myself, the one way I can do that is forgiving the people who have done wrong to me. It will cause more stress to build anger and peace is more productive.”

         Professor Lewis B. Smedes, Professor of Theology and Ethics and a renowned Christian author and speaker described the effects of forgiving in the following terms:

“Forgiving does not erase the bitter past. A healed memory is not a deleted memory. Forgiving what we cannot forget creates a new way to remember. We change the memory of the past into a hope for our future”

He was referring specifically to what happens to the individual who successfully releases his grudges and bitterness. The results are uniformly rewarding in producing contentment, improved relationships and peace of mind. There is also a concomitant improvement in health, improved self-esteem, cardiovascular function, better sleep and appetite with noticeably lessening of anxiety, hostility, and depression. This, however desirable, is never an easy task to accomplish and although many will give lip service to making an effort, very few will succeed. This is what I believe Mahatma Gandhi, the great Indian leader and guiding light in the principle of peaceful resistance to oppressive colonial rule, was alluding to, when he said: 

“The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.”

         But to those who succeed in achieving the full impact of forgiveness, the joy experienced can be indescribable. It is a joy that can only occur when there is a complete union of the mind, the spirit and the heart. It is the very kind that Mark Twain so beautifully described as, “the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.” And what St. Teresa of Kolkota, the Roman Catholic nun who devoted her life to the care of the indigent in India and the world, so genuinely declared:

“Whatever our religion, we know that if we want to love, we must first learn to forgive before anything else.”

         Even Buddha in his exquisite wisdom was quite direct and uncompromising when he described the effect of not forgiving as:
        
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.”

In the end it is not for me to judge those who cannot or will not forgive that which they might consider an unforgivable crime against them. I cannot claim to know all the circumstances and will not pass judgment. But I know from my own personal experiences, that the regrets that follow never ever go away, and you are condemned to live with the scars deeply embedded within you forever. Because of this I am convinced that irrespective of the circumstances and whatever the consequence, to forgive is the only option available to you if you want to avoid regret and truly appreciate the joys of forgiveness.  In this respect I often turn to the insightful words contained in the Holy Bible in the Letter of St. Paul to the Ephesians 4:31-32;

  “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you together with all malice. And be kind to one another, tender hearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you”.  

- Nothing in the field of human relationships is as important to any person who is concerned with ensuring the highest quality of life on earth, as to steadfastly follow the advice of St. Paul and the countless masters who encourage the very liberal application of forgiveness in all things. This after all was the message delivered by Jesus Christ and the one he showed us how to follow.


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