THE REALITY OF FEAR

“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark.

The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” 

          These words, by the ancient Greek philosopher Plato, who is

considered by most people to be one of the founders of modern Western Philosophy, go directly to the impact of fear on human life. In this very brief statement he drew clear and unequivocal attention to the differences experienced by a child who lacks knowledge and therefore is afraid of the unknown, and the adult who is fully aware of the circumstances, yet chooses to act with fear and trepidation.

To a newborn child every experience is new and unknown, and as a result it feels instinctively engulfed with fear. Every change in its milieu which is different, triggers a cry for help and its only recourse to dealing with this is to turn to the comfort of the familiar security touch of the adult. But as the child grows, gains more knowledge and is exposed more frequently to threatening experiences, it gains more confidence and shows better acceptance. And as the child acquires more information and more exposure, this understanding improves and the blanket of fear gradually recedes and is replaced by reason, knowledge and logic. Under the right conditions fear in effect is replaced by confidence and even more, a willingness to step into the unknown; which explains the impetuous actions so familiar among youth.

        

         But Fear is vital in terms of its importance to the individual’s psyche and normal body function. It is in fact a natural defense mechanism, a basic primal emotion, that is the key to the evolutionary survival of the species. It is already dominant long before the other emotions develop, with a demonstrable center in the amygdala of the brain and an integral involvement in the body’s responses. It is found deeply embedded in the individual’s psyche and is the body’s major way of issuing a warning of possible danger. It is also the body’s avenue to initiate a response for action by preparing for “fight or flight’ and creating the appropriate mental, cardiac, respiratory and musculoskeletal changes to deal with any impending situations. In many ways, it can be seen as the crucial mechanism that the body relies on to protect it when it finds itself in potentially hazardous waters.

         This however, was by no means the fear that Plato was referring to in his observation. He was referring to the tendency of people to respond to stimulation with irrational and excessive fear reactions completely out of proportion to the perceived threat. It is this totally unwarranted and unreasonable thinking that triggers a maladaptive response giving rise to overwhelming stress and negative behaviors. Whenever this happens, we set in motion a series of psychologically complex activities in the brain, causing changes that may affect the psyche and alter our perception. Not only is the individual affected in his immediate response, but they act as future triggers to repeat the action when faced with similar situations, real or imagined, that may arise. We become victims of our own doing as Leslie Calvin (Les) Brown the highly successful African-American motivational speaker and author, so wisely noted:

"Too many of us are not living our Dreams, 

  because we are living our Fears."

In this state, with our psyche rendered vulnerable, we begin to use the developing fear as an excuse, to look back at ways to avoid past experiences rather than looking forward to find ways and means to neutralize it. Instead of facing our fears as we should, we become masters of self-deception and spend the time finding excuses, while being fully aware of the price we are paying. This indeed is The Reality of Living with Fear and accepting the “monster” whose only concern is to reinforce pain and disappointment and render the individuals as slaves to their emotions. The profound tragedy is that in the greatest majority of examples, the victim is fully aware that the behavior is unacceptable and unproductive, and more often than not, knows ways to correct it. But he suffers from a paralysis that totally overwhelms his psyche. This indeed is what Plato so eloquently described as “the real tragedy of life” and what an Unknown Author took pain to explain with some examples of cause and effect:

“You are not scared of the dark; you are scared of what’s in it.

You are not afraid of people around you; you are afraid of rejection.

You are not afraid of loving; you are afraid of not being love in return.

You are not afraid to let go; you are afraid to accept the truth she’s gone.

You are not afraid to try again; you are afraid of being hurt again.”

         It is against this background that the giving in to fear must be viewed. Fear must never ever be looked at, as many tend to do, as the absence of courage. In fact, as Bruce Lee, the accomplished Chinese-American actor and Kung-Fu exponent quite rightly observed:

“Courage is never the absence of fear.

It is the ability to act in the presence of fear.”

As stated previously, fear is an integral component in the body’s defense mechanism, without which it would not be able to anticipate and deal with any threat to its survival. It becomes a serious problem only when the response is completely out of proportion to the prevailing condition. When fear has lost it real purpose, and has turned its anger inward and when instead of protecting the individual it becomes an enemy intent on destruction, then and only then it can be considered as a tragedy to life. In this state, it can influence every possible aspect of human thought and behavior rendering the individual a helpless slave to its falsehoods. One only has to look at the enormous combination of presentations that result from the anxieties, phobias and disturbed behaviors to determine its hold on humanity. The reality is that it most often succeeds because the victims find it extremely difficult to break away, remaining locked in their self-made prisons by their own fears. 

Thich Nhat Hanh, the internationally recognized Vietnamese Buddhist monk residing in France, summarized this finding most appropriately when he noted:

“People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer a suffering that is familiar.”

The real tragedy of life for these unfortunate victims is that all but a few, never succeed in completely breaking the chain of fear that binds them, and are condemned to live out their lives, never fully able to share in all the joys and blessings of happy living.

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