“If it is to be, it’s up to me”
This statement was made famous by William H. Johnson, an
African-American artist who is considered by most authorities to be one of the
greatest American artists of the 20th century. Beginning from a very
deprived and unfulfilling environment in South Carolina
he was able, by sheer ability and commitment to succeed in making an indelible
impact on the art world, both in America
and in Europe. In addition, he was one of
those rare people whose influence goes well beyond art as he truly demonstrated
how much can be achieved in life, if one is willing to take responsibility for one’s
choices and actions in one’s personal and productive life.
The common tendency for people to blame others for their
poor lack of judgment and responses is by any measure, one of the greatest
failures in the world today. Rather than take responsibility for their actions,
accept their mistakes and learn from them, most people will prefer to look for
excuses or blame other people or circumstances for any negative outcome that
develops. They don’t seem to understand that taking responsibility means
acknowledging and accepting the choices made and the actions taken as a
consequence, nor are they concerned about the results these may produce. They
prefer to hide behind excuses or find reasons to justify them, rather than
facing up to the reality of the situation. In many ways, this behavior can be
viewed as a reflection of the individual’s integrity, his poor basic
personality and his lack of maturity, and shows itself in every thing done by
the individual. They continue to fail miserably simply because they are unable
to take up the responsibility to succeed.
Michael Korda, the very well
respected English born author and editor-in-chief of the prestigious book
publishers Simon and Schuster, neatly
summarized this in the following quotation:
“Success on
any major scale requires you to accept responsibility. In the final analysis,
the one quality that all successful people have is the ability to take
responsibility.”
By any measure, taking responsibility is a very important
principle for every individual to undertake during his lifetime. It is even
more important as he enters his adult years when his behavior is measured not
by what happens to him personally, but how he responds to the people, events
and activity that affect his living. The great majority of people, for a
variety of reasons, suffer from stagnation in their growth and maturity during
early development as a result of environmental influences or prevailing
attitudes. They will arrive to adulthood overwhelmed with a sense of fear of
the consequences, and as a result elect to do nothing. Unfortunately this fear
becomes very quickly imprinted in the individual’s psyche, and just as quickly
becomes a repeating standard of behavior. From this point on, there is less and
less awareness that damage is being done, and increasing conviction that the
right action is being taken. Eleanor
Roosevelt, the wife of President
Franklin D. Roosevelt, the 32nd President of the United States,
who in her own right was an accomplished diplomat, activist and author, placed
this in the right context when she observed:
“In the long run, we shape our lives and we shape
ourselves. The process never ends until we die. And all the choices we make are
ultimately our own responsibility.”
The
action of taking responsibility when executed promptly and appropriately, serves
to accomplish a number of very important services to the individual’s psyche.
It provides a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment for the completion of a
task and this is reflected in personal decisions and efforts made. It
encourages further growth and maturity, including becoming more assertive and
positive in the making and carrying out of decisions. It increases confidence
and reduces the need to depend on others for any decisions on life. This means
that any decisions taken by the person will be done to suit his needs and not
to pacify others. This can only lead to a life of more fulfillment where,
rather than being driven to want and to take, they become givers and sharers.
Their life overflows with feeling of satisfaction and contentment and this is
visible in the work they do.
But when the opposite situation operates, when
the individual has to depend on others
to function in any way, this will destroy the person’s confidence and
self-worth and will never be rewarding or satisfying. It is only when taking
responsibility is allowed to evolve to its fullest in the individual that the
true purpose of life can be appreciated. Too many people spend so much of their
time weighed down by their fears and their insecurities and their need to
oblige others that they fail to develop, lose their purpose in life and end up
never knowing their true identity. This is the inevitable shame of not taking
responsibility. Abraham Lincoln, one
of America’s
greatest statesmen, its 16th President, who effected the
emancipation of slavery and successfully led the nation in the Civil War,
unequivocally described this in the following direct statement:
“You
cannot escape the responsibility of tomorrow by evading it today”
Failing
to take personal responsibility on a regular basis for one’s actions can result
in a series of unsatisfactory consequences over time. They can give rise to
distrust, anger, hostility and suspicion that will adversely affect any attempt to corrective
actions and lead to a further deteriorating
interpersonal relationships. It is not
surprising therefore that the incidences of emotional lability, vulnerability
and suspicion of others become quite prominent in their behaviors and render
them incapable of developing lasting or meaningful relationships. It is not
surprising therefore that they will readily blame other people or circumstances
for any or all of their difficulties and shortcomings, and increasingly reject
accepting the responsibility for their actions. Instead of trying to take
corrective action, they end up becoming arrogant and suspicious. Some try to
justify all of their actions by making up stories or spreading rumors to
discredit others, even as they are
pushed to the periphery of their society. It is this attitude that led the
famous American author, humorist and entrepreneur Mark Twain (Samuel Clement) to offer the following advice:
“Keep away from people who try to
belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make
you feel that you too, can become great.”
The
consequences of not taking responsibility can be very serious indeed. They can
effectively negate all the good features the individual may possess and render
them vulnerable and dependent. When any
action is undertaken with a full sense of responsibility, the need for
dependence on others vanishes and confidence on personal ability dominates. But
when one fails to do so, there develops a sense of inferiority and inertia which
is reflected in the actions and behaviors of the individual. This inability
induces an overall sense of helplessness and inadequacy which so distorts the
individual’s thinking that any attempt to take responsibility by the individual
will give rise to feelings of weakness and powerlessness to others, making them
feel as if they are disrespecting them. Far too many people weighed down by
negative feelings, bad experiences, unfortunate environments or just bad genes
are suffering under a cloud of insecurity and unhappiness brought on by their
failing to accept the responsibility for their lives.
In
the end, we will all do well to recognize that there is a certain joy or
satisfaction and a personal honor in taking responsibility of our actions at
all times. What matters above all is not that such actions may be mistaken or
misguided, but the fact that by accepting responsibility we have the
opportunity to correct them or learn from them. Without this taking place, we
are condemned to blindly repeat the same mistakes over and over and get the
same results. When we cowardly choose to make excuses by blaming other people
or other circumstances we will continue to fail and in doing so, continue a
life of unhappiness and regret and all else will fail. As Les Brown, the highly respected African-American motivational
speaker, author and politician so wisely noted:
“If you take responsibility for
yourself, you will develop a hunger to accomplish your dreams.”
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