“You came with nothing, but look at what
you left behind.”
This powerful comment introduced a short but very impressive article entitled “Spheres of Influence” written by my grandniece, Angelina Naime Lee, in which she recalled the life of a ‘Loved One’, and the wonderful legacy she left behind. In her own uniquely personal style, Angelina succeeded in reminding us all, that our legacy is the only way we have of leaving a definitive meaning for the many years we lived on this earth, and even more important, of putting our own personal stamp on the future.
A legacy, as I previously observed is “not any of the things you do for yourself, for these will all die with you, but the things you do for others, because they will stay in the hearts and minds of all who remain back.” Far too many of us seem to prefer to spend our lives intent on projecting personal images, building monuments, amassing fortunes and creating an aura of invincibility for ourselves without ever realizing that these all, like the sands in the desert, will be blown away, and leave nothing behind. A legacy is the only memory of a person’s life that lives on long after his presence on earth has faded away, and is in fact, the only reliable way by which his life and his deeds can truly be remembered. But however, for this memory to be truly considered as being genuine, it must not only reflect the essential contributions of his life’s work, but must also represent in stark and untainted terms, a true portrait of the person, his hopes, dreams and wishes.
This world we all share is one that has existed long before we arrived, and will no doubt continue to exist long after we depart from it. But while we are here, it is incumbent on us, like those who were here before us and those who are yet to come, to try to serve as its designated stewards, with the sacred responsibility to care for it, respect it and leave it, whenever we can, a little better than when we arrived. This is the footprint we are all expected to leave behind, and from this legacy we leave, will be seen the true measure of who we were, the full extent of our contributions, and in many instances what were our true intentions; either for good or for bad.
Some people by their contributions and their examples, have left such a potent footprint for good that they have, over the years they lived on earth and long after, successfully influenced succeeding generations to follow them and even spurred them to greater heights. And again, there were others whose selfish and misdirected actions during their lifetime have caused such massive damage, destruction, disappointment, and pain to countless millions that their names and their footprints are recalled, remembered and repeated only in infamy. But for the majority of those who were given the opportunity to spend time on this earth, they wasted their whole lives like so much flotsam floating aimlessly on the river of life, totally unconcerned with anything but the present; doing nothing and also contributing nothing. Without exception, the stories of all these people are permanently engraved in the pages of their history, and are available for all who care to search.
Above all else, the fundamental idea for leaving a legacy should never be from a need for self-glorification, but rather from a sincere desire to pass on to the succeeding generations, the good traditional values and principles for a successful life on this earth. Its true mission is essentially for the preservation and the promotion of those positive values and good moral character that had been passed on, or were acquired during a person’s lifetime, and equally, to set standards of living that will be remembered for the contribution they made in enhancing other people’s lives. A legacy should never be used for the individual’s self-enrichment, but only to leave footprints that will have meaning to all those whose lives will be touched.
At an individual level, the core reason for leaving a legacy is not only because of a wish or desire to be remembered for what a person may have contributed, but equally, to pass on to the others all the good things that had been passed to him by other people. To be truly genuine, this must reflect only the ideals that are worthy of passing on, and not made up of an endless list of personal achievements and aggrandizement. Above all else, the legacy must be guided by an honest desire to help others, and not just to impress them, and equally, it must reflect the passion and the drive from the person that guided and sustained these efforts. To be successful and to achieve the hoped-for results of a good footprint, a person’s legacy must not be used as the vehicle for applause that so many seek, but be solely recognized for the causes it projects. It must always reflect a life of expression, of care and of attention, and not one that creates or enhances personal impressions. And above all, a true legacy is never concerned with making one’s presence noticed, but is meant to ensure that by his deeds, his absence will be noted.
A legacy is not an historical account of any successes achieved, or conquests made, or challenges overcome, or stories created, nor is it meant to embellish the person’s popularity and his power; these will all be found in the person’s biography. A Legacy instead, is faithfulness to a principle, a cause, or an ideal, and a determination to establish, to live and to pass on to others, by word and by example, only those elements that serve to enhance the quality of life for others, and to pass on to succeeding generations a tradition of truth and honesty. It is also a sincere hope and a desire to be remembered, not for one’s successes or one’s conquests, but rather by the values and the character he exhibited, and equally, by the contribution to improving the life of others, and the world we live in. Peter Strople, a very well-respected, Canadian-born business leader with an interesting history, summarized this in a very simple but highly effective manner when he noted:
“A legacy is not leaving something for people.
It is leaving something in people.”
As the years passed by, I have become more and more aware of my own need to record my thoughts and feelings so that my children and all who cared about me, will have some kind of legacy of my life, my dreams and my hopes. Some of this I have already done in my books which are meant to reflect my life and how I lived it. As I have grown older, I have become more aware of the things that are really important in life, and with each passing year, I have been able to see more clearly, and to know more surely, what really, really matters. Above all else in life, I have come to realize that the love and traditions that a family shares are treasures beyond value. The dreams we shared, the laughter, the sadness, the successes and the failures, the losses and the triumphs, the sad partings and the happy reunions, the omissions and the regrets, and all the events, big and small, that formed part of our lives as we struggled on through the years. Those moments will always remain firmly buried within our memories, indelibly imprinted as footsteps in our lives. They not only form part of a family’s battles to survive, but are the things that in the end will mean the most to the family, as they become part of its foundation.
Memories are like gifts that are bestowed upon loved ones, and they live on from generation to generation. In the same way that my parents have passed on their traditions and legacy to me, so too it is my duty to my children and to all others, to pass on my own legacy, so that they will get to know the real me. I see these memories as a timeless wellspring of bonds that keep us close to one another, across the generations. Just as I looked back fondly to the years I shared with my father and mother, and all my siblings, so too I hope my children will, in time, look back on my life. For like the DNA that we all share, these memories are strong bonds that will link us from one generation to another, and the traditions passed on to me by my parents, will continue on in my children and those if all my siblings, and then their children and their grandchildren. This indeed is our only true legacy in life.
I have always believed that a man will be remembered not by how much money he left in the bank, or the monuments that bear his name, or the power he amassed. But he will be remembered by how many lives he has touched, how many people he helped, and how much of himself he shared with others. These are all principles that were passed on to me, by word and by deed, by my parents, and throughout my life, I have tried to live by them. In my own life I have sought to continue the tradition passed on by my father, to try in all things to live a life guided by honesty and integrity, to ensure that my word is always my bond, and to do my best to leave the world a little better than I found it. And I have tried always to share my late mother’s unending love of family, and her ceaseless desire to help those in need; whether I succeeded to do so, only time will tell.
Everyone leaves something behind with which he hopes to be remembered when he dies. His name, his reputation, his children or even a book or garden or house or memory, or anything at all that reminds others of him; something that touched others enough to have left an indelible stamp or image of his inner soul and being. This is his legacy. This is what he would forever be remembered for. He will not be remembered for his looks, or the clothes he wore, or his fabulous possessions, but rather: what he stood for, or what minds he changed, or whose life he helped. His legacy may never be found on any of the monuments or structures that bear his name, but, if he succeeds, they will be carved in the hearts and minds of those he leaves behind, and without doubt, those who will follow.
Billy Graham, the great American-born Christian evangelist, who preached to the world, once said:
“The greatest legacy one can pass on to one's children and grandchildren is not money or other material things accumulated in one's life, but rather a legacy of character and faith”
This too, is the legacy that my father and mother have passed on to us, and it is the very one that I have tried to live by for all my life. For if all I am remembered for is my success or appearance or reputation or any other such material achievements, then I would have failed myself, my family and my father’s expectations. I would rather be remembered as a devoted father, a loving and committed husband, a caring son and brother, a genuine friend to all God’s creatures.
To me, my legacy is like putting my stamp on the future, so that those who follow me will be able to judge whether I succeeded in changing my world for the better. If I succeeded in doing so, and if I was able to help someone to live a better life, or if there is someone who can come forward and attest that I have done so, then my life was well worth living. If this was not possible, then I would have failed miserably, and my legacy will be one of shame, selfishness, and disappointment. -Only time will tell!
I have always believed that the greatest legacy I can leave to my own children is a good name, my respect, my love, and also, good, happy memories. I see these as beautiful shells lying on the seashore cast by me and washed up by the tide of life and picked up by the children as they walked along. They are then kept locked in their memories until one day when the memories reappear and the children recall with joy and happiness my words and my life with them. In the same way I continue to recall so many times a day, my beautiful memories with my parents, my brothers and sisters, their smiling faces and their words of advice, I sincerely hope that after I am gone, my own children will similarly joyfully recall their father with equal zeal and appreciation.
This indeed is the legacy I strive to leave. My deepest pray and hope is that I too will have done enough to merit from my children the same degree of love and respect that my parents achieved from all of us. If that happens, then I will rest easy that my life will not have been in vain. Then I would have succeeded to have passed on to another generation the beautiful legacies that were passed on to me. My deepest hope as well, is that I have succeeded in passing on to my children the urgent need to maintain the continuity of this sacred legacy, so that they too will be moved to continue the tradition when their time comes. Perhaps they might be guided by the words of Paul Tsongas, the former US congressman and presidential candidate, when he observed:
“We are a continuum. Just as we reach back to our ancestors for our fundamental values, so we, as guardians of that legacy, must reach ahead to our children and their children. And we do so with a sense of sacredness in that reaching.”
-This then is the sacred purpose of leaving a legacy. It has nothing to do with individual wisdom, strength or ability, but instead, everything to ensuring that the fundamental values of love, respect and caring will be passed on from generation to generation.
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