DAILY SLICES OF LIGHT

 Shining Light into your Darkness

“Only in the darkness can you see the stars”

         This beautifully explicit observation was made on April 4, 1968 by the late Martin Luther King Jr., the American civil rights leader, in a public address in Memphis, Tennessee. It was in fact, the very last major speech he made before he was assassinated 1 day later, and is considered to have been one of the best of the many outstanding speeches he had delivered in his lifetime.

          In making the statement, he was reminding his audience that it was only when we are forced to descend to our lowest levels of desperation in a conflict, in our darkest hour, will we begin to see a way out of the conflict, and to discern more clearly who our true friends are. And it is only at this level, when we are stripped of all the added accessories of living which we all take for granted, when losing appears to be inevitable, will we find the strength to dig deep enough into ourselves to find our true potential, and see clearly enough the answers we needed to know. For, in the same way that we can only begin to appreciate the beauty and the majesty of the stars when the sky is dark, so too, we will only find our true capabilities, our basic strengths and our weaknesses, after descending to our darkest, lowest point. And it is only after we have suffered through the pain of this journey, will we come to know the true meaning of humility, and learn the fundamental purposes of our life.

          Carl Jung, the outstanding German psychotherapist, whose original work and his approach to life, has greatly influenced my own thinking and behavior, once observed:

 “One does not become enlightened by imagining figures in the light, but only by being conscious in the darkness.”

 When Jung referred to the ‘dark side’ of the person, he was in fact referring to the deeply embedded fears and insecurities which together cause so much pain and disappointment to the individual, and can seriously interfere how he views his life. Until the individual finds the courage to step into the darkness, make the effort to understand his ‘demons’, and learn to control or to rise above them, he will remain at their mercy. In the same way that a person can only know whether he is capable of swimming in the deep ocean, is by jumping into the water, so too, only by truly knowing yourself in the darkness of your life, can you then confidently step out into the light of reality, and for that matter, can you truly appreciate the darkness of others.

          Your own character, like a good photograph, will never be able to show its true colors simply by reflecting the light from others, but will only fully bloom, if you allow it to develop in the darkness of yourself. Unless he deliberately acknowledges the dark side of his mind, no one can ever succeed in truly knowing himself, nor can he gain insight on all the repressed thoughts and beliefs that have accumulated over the years of living. Nor will he understand the reasons for the continued fears, insecurities and rejection that fully control his life, nor why he continues to deny or ignore them. Nor will he be aware of those dark shadows caused by the endless list of repressed thoughts and experiences which he had consciously and unconsciously, buried rather than facing them. All of this indeed, was the “darkness” that Jung was referring to, the one that was preventing the person from truly knowing himself, and forcing him to show the outside world a different picture of himself. As Jung himself frequently stated:

 “No one can ever begin to know himself, while still having to deny those aspects of himself that lay buried in the mind.”

         Without question, the single most significant failing of human beings in general, is their unwillingness to address their own faults. Rather than having to face themselves, their greatest critics, they try to reflect the blame on to other people, or on to things or other sources, irrespective of they being real or imagined. They go the great lengths to focus their search outwardly in a pseudo-attempt to find explanations and answers, without ever intending to do so; all because of their unwillingness to admit to, far less to grasp their own faults. This fact has led the Dalai Lama, in his profound wisdom, to declare:

 “When you think everything is someone else’s fault, you will suffer a lot. But when you realize that everything springs only from yourself, you will learn both peace and joy.”

          In so many ways, we are all, in one way or another, locked in a battle going on inside of us, as we try to come to terms with the repressed or the unconscious aspects of our personality. We are, to varying degrees, suffering in silence from the many feelings of fear, sadness, anxiety, disappointments and failure which have occurred, and are continuing to occur, for which we had no answers. They hover around constantly in our minds, clouding it and preventing us from being able to experience the happiness, the joy, the pleasure, the peace, the love and the hope to which we are entitled. They muddle our thinking, confuse our decision, and interfere with our behavior, and, as a consequence, render us incapable of making full use of all the opportunities available to us.

          But having to face, far less defeat, these ‘demons’ can be a formidable exercise, which, even under the most favorable situations, is never a guaranteed success. Even with the best intentions, and a genuine desire to do so, the task can, at some times, appear to be almost impossible to achieve. The main reason for this difficulty can be found in the fact that this ‘darkness’, made up of all the repressed and unconscious experiences accumulated over a life time, is like an iceberg of which only 10% is even accessible, and the other 90% remaining out of reach. This explains why so many people are unable to get past the obstacles in their lives; not for want of trying, but rather for lack of understanding how it should be done. There is an instinctual wall of fear embedded in the person which forces him to turn away from tackling it, or to bury it deeper into his psyche, both of which results in increasing the darkness. This is the kind of darkness that spawns the anxieties and the insecurities, and aggravates the situation. And the one that, more than 3000 years ago, the ancient Greek playwright and philosopher, Sophocles was moved to cry out in despair:

 “Dark, dark! The horror of darkness, like a shroud, wraps me and bears me through mist and cloud.”

         Like any other of the endless number of conflicts we may get into during our lifetime, in dealing with this crisis, we always have two options available to us; we can accept the challenge, face it head-on and hope to win, or if we cannot, at least neutralize it so it causes no concern. Or alternatively, choose to cower in fear and run away or hide from the threat. Too many of us however, are so overwhelmed by the thought of confrontation, and afraid to allow ourselves to face the repressions, fears and insecurities that we harbor, that we choose to just deny them. For a number of reasons, we are content to throw our hands up in despair, turn away in fear, and stay locked in our prison of uncertainty. Sometimes there may be legitimate reasons, but most of them are mainly reactive because we were lacking the confidence to deal with them when they are exposed. This illusion of uncertainty is indeed our greatest enemy, the one that the great ancient Chinese philosopher, Lao Tzu, warned us against in his comment:

 “There is no greater illusion than fear.”

                But that notwithstanding, this brief life we have all been given to spend on this earth would have been wasted, if we allow ourselves to remain enslaved in the prison of uncertainty. Therefore, we have no alternative but to find ways to confront the dark part of our psyche, to banish, or at least quiet our demons, and allow the light of reality to return. This requires, not only finding the courage and confidence to go forward, but also the understanding and insight to make the right decisions. It needs equally, the illumination and good sense to do the right thing and to recognize that darkness will not be overcome with more darkness, but with the bright light of knowledge and good sense. Above all else, there has to be a willingness to forgive yourself and others, for the pain that was caused, and equally, forgive yourself from the guilt that invariably followed. The past, however traumatic it might have been, must also be fully embraced, for otherwise, it will return to haunt us again and again. And throughout all our efforts, the future should be kept in the right context, not to be feared, but to be anticipated.

          Perhaps, the Holy Bible offers, as it so often does in the affairs of mankind, the most succinct advice of all, in Romans 12:21:

 “Do not be overcome by the darkness of evil, but overcome the evil, with good.”

 -This indeed is the message that we are all meant to live by. Rather than allowing ourselves to be overcome by the darkness of our fears and anxieties, we can choose to overcome the darkness, with the bright light of knowledge and understanding. And in so doing, live the full and satisfying life that is our entitlement.

 

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